Sunday, November 24, 2013

Writing Times (English 1/5)

   For my English class once (I think this was Freshman year of college), I wrote a whole bunch about the conditions under which I like to write, which was the assignment, the conditions under which you like to write. I wrote this big, half or full page thing, which really- such exercises really help you step back and analyse your own stereotypical pathways, break down your own motivations for doing things, and methods-- it helps you not only not become tunnel visioned, but to discover what drives you and how to fuel that. And it was fascinating.

   There was a power blink, though, and the whole original page was never saved. So I can't give you what was originally written there... But basically what I said in that original paper was this: I just write as if I’m thinking onto paper, so any conditions that would be suitable for thinking are suitable for writing. Except in bed, and same such stuff, or course. Bedtimes is real good times for thinking, but you have to remember what you thought if you want to write on it the next morn.

    But, all of that’s me talking in the present, and that wasn't in the original for-college-English writing. I do have a snippet of what I wrote later, punctuation and paragraphing standardized (of course I redid the paper; it was an assignment- I couldn't just say, oh, the power went out, there's no paper for you.) First I explained the thinking-writing thing, and also why I couldn't offer the full version, and then I went into it:
   So I don’t write under conditions that grab your attention, such as watching television or listening to music. (I remember I rambled quite a bit about this.)
   If I am writing about an event, I see that event in my mind, like a movie, and I translate these images into words, as if I'm writing a movie novelization. If I am writing about, say, logic, or something, I think the debate in my mind, just writing down whatever comes. Thinking onto paper, with my brain always generating the content a few steps in front of what I’m writing at the moment.
   I’m never at a loss of what to say, because, really, who ever stops thinking (meditation aside)? And now I’m at a loss for what to say, because I've just summarized what I wrote about writing conditions. Boom?
   Fun stuff. And... deeply personal, but all art creation is at one level or another. Communication and all that. This is neat; I think I'll give you more from my English assignments.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, November 22, 2009

Click to embiggen.
TRANSCRIPT:
Marvin: Collin!
Where the heck were you in last week's strip?
Collin: I'm on strike!
Marvin: [speaks scribbles]...
What for?
Collin: I'mma supportin' the writers' strike!
Marvin: ...
Collin that ended two years ago.
Collin: oh.
Are we even union?
Marvin: If only writers', Collin. If only writers'. 

NOTES:
   I get bizarrely political here. Sorry 'bout that. It's true, though, that the writer's guild was pretty much treated like crap in Hollywood before the strike, and even now they're not quite as respected as they should be. (Maybe it was because the strike forced awesome shows like Bryan Fuller's Pushing Daises off the air. (But then again, it also did some good stuff, like forcing season seven of 24 to be shot all at the same time, ensuring supertight pacing and just a thrillride of a day.)) But, there. I'm off my soapbox now.

Friday, November 22, 2013

Catching Fire

   Will Catching Fire be good? How does that look? Like a worthy sequel to Hunger Games?

   And was Hunger Games that good in the first place? All of its success could be chalked up to a reasonably strong source material and the fan base behind that. I'm not knocking it. It certainly didn't make any surprising decisions, though. Oh, sure, they deviated from the book, they showed outside of the first-person present-tense head of Katniss Everdeen. It's not like anyone else wouldn't have done that.

   The first film was done with incredible competence, which is not a trait so rare in Hollywood these days, but not so common either. But, anyone competent would have done the exact same thing. I've talked about how ideally substance should lead to style, which is what happened here. It's actually quite a clever path, a line of causation that links one decision to another. T-Bone Burnett did music on the film because the book was so violent, yes?

   Let's trace the logic of that: it's a violent novel about teens killing each other; in order to preserve a rating low enough for the film's intended audience to go see it (but keep the violence high enough to preserve the core of the story that it's so easy to become dehumanized in so violent a scenario) there'd need to be some form of disguising to violence, to keep the brutality there but not be forced to show the unpleasant side effects. This meant shaky camera work: suggestive of violence and frenetic action, giving a visceral experience like the audience is actually a participant in it, while also giving the excuse for quick cuts so nothing extremely gory stays on-screen for too long. Handheld camera work suggests a documentary style, a documentary of a rural society living in the shadow of futuristic governmental oppressors suggests folk music.

   So it was well-made. As a standalone film, without a book behind it, it's better, though, since none of it's surprising with the book. (Which is generally how these things should go, so, maybe never mind.)

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, November 15, 2009

Click to embiggen.
TRANSCRIPT:
Marvin: Shoot, um...
...
Hey, umm...
Collin!
...
Wanna know what's cool?
(imitating Collin) Why, I certainly do!
Marvin: Affadavits! Them things is radcore!
...
One of these days I'm gonna kill that boy.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Best of Pirate Cat, part VII: Non-deviantART Examples


   You don't see many "Pirate Cat" hits outside of deviantART for whatever reason. I really can't guess the reason. It's actually kind of baffling. But there's these:

I love Tail Concerto! I'm not sure why I didn't include Monjya here in the exhaustive cat pirate list earlier; quite possible because I don't think (s)he's a real pirate.


catpirate by Nicholas Liaw

   This figurine.

   And finally, Eric Scales over at Disney has got a whole category in his sketch blog dedicated to pirate cats. They're really good; check 'em out: http://ericscalessketchbook.blogspot.com/search/label/pirate%20cats

Friday, November 15, 2013

deviantART Review: Best of Pirate Cat, part VI

   Aside from those apparent one-offs of pirate cats on deviantART, there are a few users who have a who series of cats commingled with piracy going on. Here as the ones I could find.

   First off, there was deviantART user FireflyStudios character Captain McSnowpaws, but it's hard to tell exactly what that was since Firefly took down his deviantART after realizing that having a public exhibit made art no longer fun. Makes sense. Nevertheless, the character was at least somewhat popular, considering there was a contest to add some wenches to his crew. Or, maybe not that popular, as the contest was cancelled due to lack of interest. You can read the full contest details, as well as more information on the world of Captain McSnowpaws, here.

   I've managed to scrounge down one of the two characters that did get submitted in time (or at least I think that's what this is,) so may I introduce you to aluinn's Damala Sevilen:
http://aluinn.deviantart.com/art/Damala-Sevilen-82563969

   Big Cat Designs has an entire thing going on called "Pawrates" (heh, heh) "of the Catibbean" (heh, heh, heh,) and though not all of those drawings are in the category, you can at least see some of that and get a sample here.

   Another one: Natalie Ewert, user: Natamon on deviantART, has an entire little thing going on where she takes people's photographs of cats I guess? and converts them into some really gorgeous pirate cat paintings. Admittedly this practice seems kind of arbitrary or random at first, but it's a spin-off series from her "Bejeweled" series, which is the same thing with cats dressed in beads. See? That makes slightly more sense. 

   So, yeah. You know how I'm doing this research for Cap'n Patches? Well, it turns out deviantART user Anime-Tenshi22 also has a pirate cat character named Patches. And he's a captain. His name isn't Cap'n Patches, or even as far as I can tell Captain Patches, but it's Patches nonetheless. Well then. There was a short little story (if you can call it that) for children written in Creative Writing class about him. You can see that and all of the drawings in that set by clicking the links in this link here: http://anime-tenshi22.deviantart.com/art/Patches-Kitty-cat-Pirate-129659702?q=gallery%3Aanime-tenshi22%2F632951&qo=109



Thursday, November 14, 2013

deviantART Review: Best of Pirate Cat, part V

   Arrrgh- no pun intended- but Arrrgh I don't know anymore. Okay, here, let's just go through the rest of these quickly.

   He's a Pirate - Kitty Pirate

   Argh Cat Pirate
by ~Teagle


by *TsaoShin


   ahoy there, meow



Wednesday, November 13, 2013

deviantART Review: Best of Pirate Cat, part IV

   Files not named Pirate Cat. This one's name is LissyBear's "Pirate Cat Pumpkin," which, you can see, is not named "Pirate Cat" due to the addition of the word "Pumpkin" at the end of it. It shouldn't count, because it's not a drawing, but I just love it because it's just so cute and creative and lazy all at the same time.


   Holy crap. Actually, the more I look at it, the more I think I might have actually drawn that. That exact pirate cat. That's in my handwriting, and handwriting is supposed to be, you know, unique. That is exatcly what I would do and exactly exactly exactly how I would do it. I think I might have drawn that I think I might have drawn that.

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

deviantART Review: Best of Pirate Cat, part III

   Ones with the name of "Pirate Cat," but not necessarily with that capitalization. Like this one from PandoraBox178, called "Pirate cat." See that lowercase "cat?"


Or the capitalization in this one, in all lowercase, from Marcelo-Ilustra?


Or this tattoo design, also in all lowercase, from Cocktailshaker?


   This one... This one is just "piratecat," one word. Does that count? It's uncapitalized.

*

   Even if it does count, this one, also by garuru, definitely does not, as its name is simply, "pirates."

*

   But, you know, they're by the same artist. I wanted to lump them together. Alright. It also serves quite handily as a segue. Next time, pictures whose names aren't "Pirate Cat." Like this one by miro42, called Pirate Cats. 


   Oh, shoot. That one would have worked really well in last time's line drawing installment. Oh, well. Too bad there's more than one of them. According to the image description, the theme at Sketchbomb SF that month was "pirate cats," (yeesh,) pirate cats, more than one, so...


Monday, November 11, 2013

deviantART Review: Best of Pirate Cat, part II

   Best of Pirate Cat, part two. More deviantART images named "Pirate Cat." Prepare to start seeing things in black and white! Which means, some line drawings, coming at you now.

From johndevilman:
From aliwababe:

   Tigers count, right? Well, erm, in this case it'd be tigresses, but... no? They don't? Well, I'm out of drawings, then. Or at least ones with the file name "Pirate Cat," out of all of my top pirate cat drawing selections. Maybe?


   No, no. That one's file name is "pirate cat." All lowercase, see? We're looking for files named "Pirate Cat." I've still got plenty of those.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

deviantART Review: best of Pirate Cat, part I

   Garrr why did I spend all afternoon looking at pictures of pirate cats? Oh man. Oh man oh man. Oh, yeah. Cap'n Patches. Well, I guess that wasn't a total bust. A search for the criteria "pirate cat" left me with literally thousands of hits, most of which seemed to be on deviantART. So, I searched for pirate cat there. Since I've seen literally every pirate cat-related image deviantART has to offer, I've decided to put only the really good ones up here. The best of the best, if you will. There's still a blooming lot of them, so I'll have to break this up into segments, but, here goes.

   As I've learned, a lot can be meant by "pirate cat," most of which meaning a pirate who is also a cat or a cat who is also a pirate. Pirate cats, you know. I would like to open up with what I think pretty much captures the spirit of being a pirate cat:


   Fittingly named "Pirate Cat," it's lockheart9's character Pirate Cat (click the link here for another Pirate Cat drawing of Pirate Cat. Opens in new window.)

   And, look, it's Wilpah's fanart of lockheart9's Pirate Cat, also named Pirate Cat:

   In fact, let's only do images with the filename "Pirate Cat" today. Here's one from Fukari:


   One from hammywammy:


Aand one from taylorsmith03:


   I think that's enough for the day. Well, except for one. But, since the copyright notice on this particular one says I am "not allowed to use this work in any way, shape, or form," I'll just link to it instead of posting it up here. Hahaha. http://ravenguardian13.deviantart.com/art/Pirate-Cat-274250121

Saturday, November 9, 2013

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, November 8, 2009

Click to embiggen.

TRANSCRIPT:
Offstage Voice: I know, right?
Marvin: Totally.
And then I said to him ---!
Collin: 
Marvin: Collin! Quit your whistling! I'm talking to someone!
Collin: 
Marvin: Seriously, man! I can't hear my own thoughts!
Collin: 
Marvin: Whistling away like a dwarf!
Collin: 
Marvin: If this were a Disney film, it would not be Snow White.
Collin: 
Offstage Voice: Which one would it be, then?
Marvin: Oh, you know...
Collin: ♪
Marvin: The one with the plot... and the characters. And it would be really dark 'cause one of them dies.
Collin: 
Offstage Voice: Yeah, that's real specific.
Collin: ♪
Marvin: BAMBI!
Shut up and help me think of this Disney film!
Collin:  

NOTES:
   Ah, Bambi. Here we see one of those brilliant little clever ideas that I've got no idea where I got the idea. Those voices from the Kool-Aid one: Bambi, along with Flower and Thumper.

Friday, November 8, 2013

Pirate Cats

   After finding no "Sea Dogs" as it has been described, I set off in search for pirate cats instead. I thought I would find fewer hits than my searches for pirate dogs. I had forgotten that this was the internet. If there are two things the internet loves, it's cats and piracy. If there are three things the internet loves... but we won't go there. (Actually, given the subject matter, there was a surprising lack of that.) Aside from the name of a defunct SF radio station (now (apparently) called Mutiny Radio,) "Pirate Cat" could refer to
  • Growltiger (natch,)
  • Captain Amelia from Treasure Planet (double natch... though, wait, wasn't she not a pirate?)
  • J-Lo's character in Ice Age (much better,)
  • YouTube's punishing of copyright offenders (they use... well, a pirate cat, apparently,)
  • Captain Spangles, the cross-eyed pirate cat,
  • Captain Stumpy the Pirate Cat by Jeremy Bliven,
  • Captain Jeb, Pirate Cat by Meg Ellen Grandfield and Meg G. DeMakas,
  • The Adventures of Peter the Pirate Cat: Light and Shadow by Michiel Van Rompaey and Nanoeshka Vervoort,
  • more memes than you can shake a stick at,
  • more t-shirt designs than you can shake a stick at,
  • just enough tumblrs and deviantarts for you to be able to shake a stick at,
  • SPANC (Space Pirate Amazon Ninja Catgirls... yeah.)
  • some dog-crushing, hot-air balloon-riding villains in an episode of American Dad,
  • The Black Cat Pirates, a pirate crew of pirates who pirate from pirate anime/manga One Piece,
  • that character from Last Unicorn I had totally forgotten about,
  • Pirate Cat Adventure, a Japanese point-and-click adventure game,
  • the flash game Pirate Cat with Broken Leg,
  • an iPhone game,
  • an entirely unrelated Windows Phone game,
  • and Captain Claw, a classic platform game for PC about a pirate cat captain who searches the seven seas for all pieces of the fabled Amulet of Nine Lives, which has been rumored to grant near immortality, which is... which is just... which is kinda... well, frig
   Well, umm... Let's see here... Anthropomorphic dogs and cats... piracy... yep, yep... Cocker Spaniards, ha! I wish I had thought of that... Granted nine lives...

   Okay, so it looks like they've also got tigers and bears, (and it looks like the final boss Omar is a lion...) And Red Tail is a bull and Aquatis is a giant frog... thing. So, that's different; not just cats and dogs but all kinds of critters. And I think the concept of the Amulet of Nine Lives is different enough from the Pieces of Eight. That's good.

   And aside from that there were a whooole bunch of drawings of pirate cats, mostly on deviantART (surprisingly not as hot a topic for furry fen-exclusive image boards as you'd think.) Anyway, I seriously think that I looked at all of them. All the pirate cat drawings, on the whole of the internet. Okay, maybe not all pirate cat drawings on the internet. But, maybe even 90%+. And I spent all that time looking at them, so darn it if I'm not going to share some of my favorites. It's coming up.


Thursday, November 7, 2013

Pirate Dogs

   Pirates and dogs just fit so well together, it's incredible that it's not already, you know, a thing. Well, a more popular thing. There's those things that I've showed you, but... It should have been a cartoon show or something already. Why hasn't it been?

   I suppose that some of the dog-pirate connections are a bit risqué (wenchy type lady dog stuff) or just generally none too appropriate for a Saturday morning toon show aimed at children (leashes = hang man's noose.) But, pirates already are called "dogs." Both are symbolized by bones. Dogs bury their crap, pirates bury their crap (and cats literally bury their crap.) Both have a noted aversion to ninja. Et cetera, et cetera.

   It should be one of those natural things that just happens. But it hasn't yet. Not like Pirate cats, which makes less sense. Pirate cats and dogs is good, but there's a lot of... just cats on their own.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Sea Dogs?

   I didn't think Cap'n Patches and the Pieces of Eight was all that original when I came up with it. I could have sworn there was a comic book with very much the same conceit out there, called Sea Dogs. But the only time in which one of those seems to have existed is entirely anachronistic from when I remember it. Maybe I've got the name wrong? I've got a pretty good memory of what the cover looked like, at least, and I distinctly remember a review of it in Family Fun magazine. So, there's that. I tried looking up Sea Dogs, Salty Dogs, Pirate Dogs, and Scurvy Dogs, but nothing fit. I did find a lot of other stuff, though, look, see.

   THINGS I FOUND THAT AREN'T EVEN VAGUELY RELATED: There was an adorably stereotypical tumblr page (whose about me reads, I quote, "about me's are too mainstream lol"), a political blog about dogs who hate Mitt Romney (like, actual, real-life, non-anthropomorphized dogs who do this), Ginny the Pirate Dog (a brave little cancer patient chocolate Labrador who has only one eye after the other one was taken out), news articles about those police dogs who can smell the cheaper materials of pirated DVDs, and that Halloween costume of the dog dressed up as the two pirates with its torso as the treasure chest between them. A whole bunch of those. An obscene amount. Really there's no logical reason for that many. That one image takes up almost the whole first page of image results. (Darn you, DIGGers, or whatever you're called. Darn you.) Oh, and a minor leagues baseball team.

   THINGS I FOUND THAT ARE SORT OF RELATED: The closest thing existing to Cap'n Patches and the Pieces of Eight that I found was Jolly Rover, an award-winning and fairly well-received point-and-click adventure game about... well, you can probably guess. Runner-up: David Riley's novella The Pirate Dogs, which is about a world of pirates where dogs happen to have the ability to speak, but, unrelated other than that.

   THINGS I FOUND THAT SCARE ME: Also there was the eerily-similarly-named-to-Cap'n Patches and the Pieces of Eight independent film Pirate Scurvy Dog's Pieces of Eight, which is about a pirate whose name is literally Pirate Scurvy Dog who tells eight stories, about... piracy, I guess. has received zero reviews, so the only clue to its quality we have is the fake quotes on the cover. They looked up Blackbeard's real name for those (Edward Teach), so, it can't be all that bad? Then again, the video is also self-described as "hilarius," which is either a typing error, a genuine oversight, or pirate-speak for "it'll give you all the venereal diseases it was possible to contract as a 16th Century swashbuckler just by watching it, yarr." I myself am leaning toward the latter, because it makes you feel dirty just looking at the DVD cover. Originally I was going to feature a picture of that here, but it made me feel bad even putting it up. (The picture is here, if you dare click on the link- it's safe for work, but I don't think it's safe for the soul, and it will like I said make you feel dirty just looking at it:
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/61%2BdI8mGeuL._SX500_.jpg)

   The point is, no matter how deep I dig, I can't find that Sea Dogs comic as it is. Which is a shame, because it looked (looks?) pretty good. Maybe I should try the same thing with pirate cats...

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Remember, Remember (To Remember, Because I Forgot Last Year)

   I should have done this last year, but I was too occupied posting about November. But this is also very Novembery, so I don't see why I forgot this. For it (as you would know being a webizen) is November 5, Guy Fawkes Day. I had in High School once made a little Guy Fawkes effigy to burn, but I decided it was just too adorable to do such a thing to and saved it. And now it's survived for me to scan it and upload it as a PNG!

Monday, November 4, 2013

Q: How is a Bird Like a Dragon?

   A: It just is, man.
YEEEAAAHHH!
   This is probably the only time I've successfully managed to draw a bird- well, not the only time, as you've seen, but, yeah, beaks are tough. Mine came out looking... draconian.

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, November 1, 2009

Click to embiggen.
TRANSCRIPT:
Collin: munch munch munch
munch munch munch
munch munch munch
chomp
munch munch munch
munch munch munch
These are really good English muffins.
chomp
munch munch munch
munch munch munch
munch munch munch
I mean it. I gotta switch brands.
munch munch munch
munch munch munch 

NOTES:
   English muffins? I think Alicia would get this one. Or really anybody in the family, I just wrote it for her? There were, just, some English muffins at the family reunion, is all, and they happened to be good, is all. It's pointless, and that's the point. It's funny. But, um, something actually interesting about this strip. I had to go in and digitally erase something that was written across the entire comic, I LOVE YOU MAN or something like that (It was I ROCK, now that I look at it again) that was written over the comic by one of my fans. Dude just wrote it across the comic, right there (across vertically, not horizontally, thank goodness.) I don't think I had drawn any of it yet, but I had drawn the panels. It took a lot of work to get panels that even, you know.

Saturday, November 2, 2013

The Other Thing


   Okay, in case you were wondering what the short haunted house story thing was, I've scrounged it down for you:
   There wasn't anything strange about the house, per se. A two-story Victorian-style summer home, painted in a tacky pink with yellow trimmings. Nothing unusual about that. No, nothing at all. It was the area around the house that was so odd. It was as if the entire world around the house was… warped. Twisted around the house. The lake over which the house looked from the back porch seemed to dimple around that area, an almost imperceptible drop in the level of the water which one could only fully appreciate lying down on the cobble beach looking out towards the lake with one eye closed. The trees twisted like snakes around it, and the sunflowers, usually following the sun, here seemed to actually turn slightly toward the house.
   Scientists have observed a phenomenon by which the light of a star that is behind another object, such as a planet, can still be seen, even though the planet is blocking that star. This is because the gravity of the planet is enough to actually warp light around it, the way light is warped through a glass of water. This house was like that. It had… gravity. 

   ...And that's it. Yeah, that's as far as I got before settling on the other thing.

Friday, November 1, 2013

ENDER'S GAME

   Well, I'm put in a bit of a unique position here, where I don't know any of the information about the movie that wasn't known a full year before it came out. How are the trailers? Awesome?  The closest thing I've got to movie posters is book covers. Man I am so jealous of you future guys who get to check out the website and everything. My poster is this book cover, which looks to be designed by the same guys who did the cover for Eoin Colfer's HG2G book And Another Thing, but I can't confirm that. It comes with a tagline and everything.

"At Battle School, Fighting is Compulsory." I know that's kind of corny, but only if you read it in an American accent; keep in mind this is an English edition of the book. Read it now. Yeah. I know, right?
   Anyway! You probably want to know what I think. Well, here you go:

THE GOOD:
  1. The twist ending. The final battle.
  2. The very concept of the Battle Room seems custom-designed for cinema.

THE BAD:
  1. The actual size of the Battle Room. In some points in the book, it works better as a vast space, and in some places, it works better as a dim enclosed area. You could get away with vagaries in a written medium, in a visual medium not so much.
  2. Let's face it: kid-on-kid violence.
  3. And nudity.

THE UGLY:

  1. To Locke and Demosthenes or not to Locke and Demosthenes? This is very important stuff in the Shadow saga, which we're assuming for the sake of this exercise that they're making. It can't seem like it's coming out of nowhere. I think that what will/should happen is the subject is brought up when Graff is talking to Ender and reintroducing him to his sister, saying that his siblings have been very busy back on earth and that a certain political pundit would very much like to meet him...
  2. The epilogue after that, for obvious reasons.


Thursday, October 31, 2013

STOMATAPODA


   The ground was covered in water. Gerald Hamilton couldn't tell how much, but based off of how it sloshed against the top of the bottom shelf of the bookcase, he would estimate about a foot.

   Which was bad. Very bad.

   Stomatapods, or Mantis Shrimp, are neither shrimp nor mantids. They derive their name from their eerie resemblance to both a shrimp and a mantis. Gerald thought they looked like evil lobsters with mantis claws. The ancient Assyrians called them sea locusts. They usually grow up to a foot long, but one species, odontodactylus Scyllarus, has been known to grow up to 15 inches in the nutritious muck from the runoffs into the Ala Wai canal of Hawai’i.

   Gerald didn't know if this was the species he was facing. He did know one thing, though: these were bigger than 15 inches. Much bigger.

   Alright, he knew two things: that the mantis shrimp that had come in with the flooding were bigger than fifteen inches, and that the only way out of the house from here was through the den. The den was lower than the rest of the house, surrounded on all sides by steps: the water level was much deeper there.

   Gerald cursed himself silently and leaped to a nearby chair. He proceeded to island hop from object to object until he stood, on the wet bar, looking into the den. A few sofa backs and the top of the television peeked up at him through the murky water.

   They weren't the only things peeking up at him.

   The mantis shrimp’s eyes are the most complex in the animal kingdom. Their visual spectrum is far larger than a human’s, and they possess vision so sharp that scientists are currently using them as a model for next, next-generation high definition technology. Both of their compound eyes have trinocular vision, and their mobile eye stalks make it so that they are able to see independent of one another. Gerald could feel thousands of compound eyes fix on him.

   There was a brief moment of absolute silence, before they charged at him all at once. He swung from the bar around the door frame, knocking drinks over and causing them to shatter against the table and go splashing into the frothing water. He swung onto the top of a cabinet and jumped from there onto the narrow spine of the back of a sofa. He realized he was stuck going this way, and had to think quickly. There was a bookshelf within jumping distance of the cabinet. He would use that. He jumped back to the cabinet, but hit the wall so hard that it knocked the bookshelf down, splashing tremendously. The mantis shrimp turned to him.

   From what he could see of their claws, he could deduce that these were smasher-type stomatapods. This meant that they could move their claws quickly, smashing into prey. In some instances the claws accelerate faster than a bullet.

   The mantis shrimp began pummeling the cabinet at faster than fifty miles per hour.

   The movement of the claws is actually so fast that it causes the tiny little bubbles underwater to implode in a burst of light, in an effect known as sonoluminescense. It is not known exactly how sonoluminescence happens; some say it is actually a form of cold fusion, while others hold that it is caused by quantum tunneling. Either way, sonoluminescence is a good thing for stomatapods, because the shock wave is enough to stun or even kill prey even if the attack misses.

   Gerald could see sparks of blue light burst out underwater as the cabinet was being pounded to smithereens. They were beautiful.

   They would probably be the last thing he would ever see.

   Light is not the only thing released by sonoluminescence. It also releases heat. Thousands of kelvins worth of heat.

   The combustion triangle is a model used to explain how fires are started. At one end of the triangle is heat. At another is an oxidizing agent, usually air. The other end is fuel. In this instance, the fuel was provided by the alcohol that was spilled from the wet bar as Gerald swung from it.

   The world caught on fire.

   There was a shrieking sound as dozens of crustaceans were boiled alive. In the end, Gerald received several third degree burns on his arms, legs and face, but at least he came out with his life.


Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Spooky Story 2013

   Based on actual science. I was doing a short story in the same vein as far as it-was-also-a-horror-story goes, about a haunted house, and I said that reality just kind of warped around the house in the same way that very large objects can warp the direction of light using their gravity, and, I don't know, man, I just got kind of distracted in my research. You know how Wikipedia gets. One thing led to another, and I discovered the real-life science behind what the real-life (if mutated and fictionalized) creatures do in tomorrow's horror story. Brace yourself. It's going to be a Michael Crichton of a ride.

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Ender's Game: The Musical?

   More Hatrack Forum stuff. Some of these threads are really good; hold on:

   Here the loyal posters of the Hatrack forums discuss possibilities of an Ender's Game musical.

The main thread is here

Topic: Ender's Game - The Musical ://www.hatrack.com/cgi-bin/ubbmain/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=next_topic;f=1;t=004700;go=newer

and the topic is discussed tangentially here:

Topic: Inconsistent Death http://www.hatrack.com/ubb/main/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=1;t=005157

With this thread imagining the Ender's Game cast as funny animals, and the subject comes up a bit:

If Enders Game Were a Disney Cartoon://www.hatrack.com/ubb/main/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=1;t=005070


Monday, October 28, 2013

Hatrack River Forums

   There's a lot of talk over how Val and Peter build up their power though the nets. Like here: https://xkcd.com/635/. Even if you were a child prodigy specially bred and raised for intelligence, the internet would still crush you. I did a lot of the research for these posts on Orson Scott Card's Hatrack River forums. If all the forums in the world were as decorous and intelligent as the Hatrack River Forums, we'd be in no shortage of excellence, and their system would work. It's actually one of the most thoughtful debate forums on the internet. Occasionally Uncle Orson himself will even descend, Godlike, from the heavens, to clarify whatever points they're debating about him. It is possible for there to be prudence on the internet. And maybe one day the entire thing will be so, just like in Ender's Game. Who knows, maybe needing a citizen's access pass to get on the nets would spur such change.

   Of course, though, it's Orson Scott Card, who is not without his share of enemies. Those that try to spur a reaction, though, tend to get shot down in some rather deferential flames. Occasionally there are they who post just to take up a personal vendetta against OSC's politics, these trolls can be summed up quite nicely (and hilariously) in this thread, here:
http://www.hatrack.com/ubb/main/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=1;t=003063

Sunday, October 27, 2013

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, October 25, 2009

Click to embiggen.

TRANSCRIPT:
Marvin: Even noticed how Wikipedia is some sort of hyperreality?
You know, a super-concentrated representation of something juxtaposed into an unnatural situation.
For example: a garden. Concentrated essence of nature forced into a boxy shape.
Nature as hyperreality.
So, Wikipedia as hyperreality. If the free, user-generated article about something- say, The Discworld series by Terry Pratchett- is funny, you can more or less be certain that the Discworld series itself is funny.
And if the article is fascinating,
Take, for example, the one about the Antikythera mechanism, or the Voynich manuscripts...
You can bet your life that the genuine artifact is fascinating.
or vandalised. 

NOTES:
   Absolutely heartbreaking punchline, I know. I was just running out of room with no punchline to end the strip, saw an exit, and took it on out.

Saturday, October 26, 2013

   Last year's ward Halloween party, one year ago today, with my father dressed up as the men's bathroom (he was cheap for costumes I guess,) he wore a toilet seat and a t-shirt with the men's symbol on it (for signs, like bathroom signs and crosswalks and things- men are represented as people, and women are represented as people with dresses. There's a website out there that dissects why exactly we sequester women from men and men from women with their own separate facilities, but I forget what its name is and I'm kind of getting away from the point anyway.)

   I had helped him haul in some stuff for the party, like Halloween carnival games, for beanbag tosses and othersuch stuff, which we loaded into the back of the truck. As the men's bathroom, on the way over there, with part of his costume being an old toilet lid he had never gotten around to using as a hall pass, he was talking about the difference between the toilet seat and the toilet lid. They had always been indistinguishable, but then came an epiphany: there is a difference between the toilet seat and the toilet lid. The lid is a lid, and the seat is a seat.

   The kicker: Women want you to put the seat down, not the lid. A major revelation. One aspect of the mystery of the opposite sex revealed. Next up: why they go to the bathroom in clusters, which is true and not a myth, because I've personally observed such behavior firsthand at least twice in my life (though, no, wait, that first time, what she actually said was "let's all be together" instead of, well...)

Friday, October 25, 2013

SPEAKER FOR THE DEAD

   The first sequel. Maybe they'd make this one before Ender's Shadow, maybe they'd make it after. I can see a parallel movie being released right after if this movie's successful, but a distant sequel...? The obvious problem here (besides a good voice actress for Jane) would be the design of the piggies. Oh, uh, and how to time-shift Asa. Just, like, digitally, makeup, or just get a new actor, or have him actually be that old when they do come out with this thing?

THE GOOD:
  1. Olhado's metal eyes, already highly visual imagery in the book, would be strongly iconic when brought to a visual medium.
  2. Juicy Novinha psychology, when every man she's ever loved died and she thinks it's her fault because the piggies killed them and the secret why is in her research.
  3. The ensemble cast of the Ribeira family has already strongly drawn characters, so they don't all get muddled like, say, the dwarfs in The Hobbit (how'd they handle that, by the way? Alright?)
  4. Jane.

THE BAD:

  1. Oh, you know, nothing. Just, uh, how it's got almost nothing to do with Ender's Game, so a true adaptation, even with such a beloved property, would be almost impossible.
  2. I can actually see this getting made into a movie, though. It'd be actually kind of claustrophobic, on-screen, with the narrow streets between the buildings and trees everywhere surrounding. Not like the hallways of Battle School, which you would expect to be more so, but that would be a sound stage and this would be on location, with completely different camera techniques used. It's a very loamy future, too, which is kind of weird.
  3. The piggies are very fond of evisceration, and it's kind of tough to get away with that especially seeing as how they're the good guys.


THE UGLY:
  1. How to depict of Jane-minus-Jane. When Jane cut off from contact with Ender, and has no solid contact or form. This would have to be done abstractly. There's emotion there, but symbolism of this sort would be the only way to show it. Maybe have some sort of "quirky" depiction of Jane earlier on that isn't in itself 100% in alignment with the book's depiction (screens, maybe?), but would make sense during the scenes of her being cut off when you consider its necessity. Maybe echo some designs from the Giant's Drink-- Jane's birth connected to Ender would give us access to depicting her early development existing entirely in the ansible network, and so they could fall back on that.
  2. The piggies themselves. The design, that is, doubtless they've got technology enough to render them convincingly.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Television Autism: Tommy Westphallutin'

   If upwards of 80% of television takes place inside the snow globe and imagination of an autistic boy (now, like, autistic man, man) then how come television often get autism so wrong? Is it because he himself does not understand it? That seems the likeliest explanation.

   You'd figure he'd learn a little more over time and changes in his understanding would reflect in the shows, but, nope, there's only more room for more misunderstanding there as the issue creeps its way into the public consciousness in real life. Dang.

Friday, October 18, 2013

XENOCIDE

   Oh, Randall... http://xkcd.com/304/

   No, but Xenocide really used to be my favorite too. It definitely had to do with the Chinese culture of Path. Han Qing-jao is a "godspoken," a genius-level caste to whom the gods allegedly manifest their will, through the form of rituals. Spoiler spoiler spoiler, it turns out it's just a plot by the Starways Congress to have a hyperintelligent task force they keep in line through debilitating OCD. Qing-jao is tasked with figuring out how all outside communication was cut off from a fleet of starships heading to destroy the planet Lusitania, which houses a deadly virus. She deduces the cutoff was caused by something of a virus itself: a sentient ghost in the machine whom we know to be Jane.


THE GOOD:
  1. Path would give Xenocide a unique flavor of all the films. I'm thinking even sepia for these sequences. At least the prologhue, when Han Qing-jao's mother dies. Others are out in space, the feel of this one could be more grounded.
  2. The return of Valentine. 
  3. The scene where the death of Quim causes Grego to inspire an angry mob. Heartbreaking.
  4. The death of Planter, sacrificing himself to prove his species sentient without the virus they carried, to prove that replacing their virus with a synthetic wouldn't render them mere animals again.

THE BAD:

  1. Miro's slurred, slow speech wouldn't be very good on film. Oh, I know, they could just have Christopher Nolan direct this one!
  2. After revisiting Ender years later at the start of Speaker for the Dead, he's 30 years older again this time around!
  3. Problems with Outside, which we'll get to soon.
  4. Younger Val and Peter's actors will have aged by now.


THE UGLY:

  1. There's a chapter there, just a long conversation about old seemingly disproven science that turns out to be correct. It's quite talky, but it's essential to the entire story. This is a great but necessary leap, as after that Jane is allowed to take people into Outspace.
  2. Speaking of, the depiction of Outspace itself. It exists outside of space and time, so if you beam your ship into it, your ship takes up the entire universe. They're bound to run out of camera angles eventually, especially considering ships designed for Outspace travel are small and cramped.


Sunday, October 13, 2013

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, October 11, 2009

Click to embiggen.
TRANSCRIPT:
Collin, thinking: The speech bubble is a fairly old invention, seen in ancient Olmec- or was it Mayan- drawings.
In Medieval times, speech was represented by scrolls coming from the speaker's mouth.
But the history of the thought bubble is much more difficult to trace. While the speech balloon has been in its present form since the 18th century, the origins of 'the cloud" are much less defined.
But I'm wondering what these things are made out of.
Collin: Marvin, I really need you for an experiment, 'k?
Think something. Think anything.
Marvin: ...
Marvin, thinking: Oh, this is ridiculous.
Collin: Good. Now I want you to, quite literally...
Marvin, thinking: Oh, this is ridiculous.
Collin: Hold that thought.
Marvin, thinking: Oh, this is ridiculous.

Saturday, October 12, 2013

CHILDREN OF THE MIND, A Book Report I Wrote Once So Why Not

Children of the Mind opens on the Chinese planet Path, where a mysterious, somewhat angry young fellow calling himself Peter Wiggin steps out of a spaceship that seemed to have materialized out of thin air and whisks a girl named Si Wang-Mu away. He explains to her that he isn't the real Peter Wiggin -who was the ruler of Earth three thousand years ago- but rather a child straight out of the mind of the real Peter Wiggin's younger brother.

For thousands of years people have had to travel from planet to planet at the light speed limit. Relativity caused them to age less than those who hadn't gone at such a high speed, but this still meant that a voyage from planet to planet essentially cut one off from friends and family who didn't go on the trip, causing them to be either very old or dead when one arrived at the planet to which they were traveling. This is how Peter’s brother from thousands of years ago had lived so long, as to now create Peter II.

For the newly-discovered way to abolish the light-speed law, which is how Peter arrived at Path, had its own side-affect. This method required going outside of the physical universe itself, where time and space did not exist, to jump back at any point else in the universe. The lack of laws of physics made any human imagining come true. Ender Wiggin had subconsciously imagined younger versions of his siblings from thousands of years ago, and they had sprung full form from his head, his own children of the mind.

Peter further explains that he needed Si Wang-Mu, who, being from the planet Path, where children were raised to be especially brilliant, to help him. The International Fleet was sending ships to destroy the planet Lusitania, which allegedly housed a deadly virus known as the Descolada (Portuguese for ungluing) that “unglued,” as it were, the very foundations of DNA itself, causing horrible mutations and painful death. In reality, the problem of the Descolada had been solved by imagining an antidote for it in Outspace,  but there was no way for the International Fleet to know this because Lusitania wasn’t on the friendliest terms with them because of the way it handled the relations with its native life.  Peter needed Wang-Mu to help him stop the destruction of an entire planet.

They arrive instantly at the planet Kamikaze, whose Kyoto-spirit philosophers heavily influence the I.F.’s  policies. Peter needs Wang-Mu’s knowledge of the careful balance of the Oriental concepts of honor and dishonor into tricking one of the philosophers into revealing from where he gets his influences. Over an episode of power-play which Peter does not understand at all, he slips up, revealing himself to be a follower of the Ua Lava  philosophy of the planet Pacifica. Or, at least, implies it.

The final connection from him to the philosophy is made by the hyper intelligent Jane, who controls faster-than-light travel, and whose communication jewel Peter wears in his ear. Jane is much more than a computer program: she is actually a soul, or Aìua, whose body is the computer network between worlds. But the I.F. is on to her, and is beginning to shut all of the linked computers down, world by world. She is losing processing power, which she needs to hold the information of whatever she is sending to Outspace together. Faster-than-light travel will soon be ended, and without this, Lusitania is doomed to be destroyed.

So it is hurriedly that she sends Peter and Wang-Mu to Pacifica, and also hurriedly that she sends Ender’s other mind-child, Valentine, and Ender’s adopted son, Miro, to scout for planets to which the Lusitanians could escape before their planet is destroyed, even though all the hurrying is bad for Ender’s Aìua. Having one’s soul split into three- one part for yourself, and one for each of your two mind-children- strains it.  On the planet Lusitania, Ender lapses into a coma.

Valentine and Miro realize that there are enough planets to which the Lusitanians can flee, and realize that that isn’t their real assignment: they are searching for the planet of the alien species that created the Descolada.

On the planet Pacifica, Peter curls up into a ball in the sand as the jewel in his ear goes dead, and Jane dies. Orbiting around a sinister planet, with limited air supply and hostile aliens surrounding, Valentine, Miro, and other scientists are trapped, with no way out…

And the I.F.’s ships will soon arrive at Lusitania…

I’m going to end the plot summary section there. I am supposed to give the reader an incentive to read the book, aren't I?

I say that this was an amazing book, full of vivid detail and memorable, realistic characters. And the plot I’m giving isn't even the half of the thoroughly amazing universe presented to us between the covers of that book. I’m completely skipping out of the complex interrelationships the characters share. I’m not even mentioning the real Valentine, or Ender’s wife, Novinha, or Quara, or any of the Piggies, or Grace Drinker, or the Hive Queen, or Plikt, or the Fathertrees, or… etc, etc.

And yet I could. Each of these characters stands out vividly in my mind. I could tell you about Novinha’s tendency to blame herself for anyone’s death, even if she had nothing to do with it. I could tell you how spiteful and arrogant Quara is, or the Hive Queen’s lack of fear of death, or the way Grace Drinker’s husband makes jokes when he is trying to keep himself from going crazy and killing someone.

I could tell you about how much it hurt Miro to say mean things to Valentine when the situation forced him into it, or Peter’s evolution as a character, from being just the embodiment of a bad childhood memory Ender had of him to the young man who saved an entire planet by averting the Fleet’s ships.

In fact, I think that character is what moves the entire plot. Sure, there’s a little action, a little romance, a little humor, and a lot of suspense, but without characters those things couldn’t be there.
Although this book is actually forth and last in the Ender’s Quartet series, which began with science fiction classic Ender’s Game, I think that Card is a deft enough characterizer and plotter to make the complex plot and relationship issues understandable, making it possible to jump right into the book.

It’s still somewhat bittersweet to leave Ender’s universe behind, though. Luckily there’s also the Shadow Quartet, which chronicles the wars and political power struggle before the original, real Peter Wiggin came to power as ruler of the Hegemony of Earth. But those books have a much different feel than these ones. And then there’s always Ender’s Game itself, which is infinitely reread-able.
If you enjoy epic tales, philosophy, science, science fiction, good characterization, Portuguese culture, Japanese culture, Chinese culture, Icelandic culture, and metaphysics, then this book would be bizarrely, creepily suited for you.

If you enjoy a darn good yarn, then this book is good for that too.

Friday, October 11, 2013

CHILDREN OF THE MIND

   Don't have much of a plot review for you this time, because I figure I could just show you THE BOOK REPORT I DID ON IT. Just read that post, coming out tomorrow.

THE GOOD:
  1. The suspense of Starways Congress shutting down the ansible network to kill Jane.
  2. Two words: Bobby. Lands. 
  3. Peter and Wang-mu doing freaking awesome crap on Divine Wind. 
  4. Valentine and Val.
  5. The exploration of the angst of Ender's imagines (yes, that's seriously what they're called- imagines. Ih-may-gin-ese. The world is awesome) would make some awesome cinema.

THE BAD:
  1. Pretty much all of it's that. Imagines angsting. It works out fine in book form, but you'd probably need a fine director to bring that to the screen. Like Wes Anderson.
  2. The stuff with the souls bouncing around in space, while fine on the page, is downright trippy. Jane causing a mothertree to bear hyperfast-growing fruit? That's pretty, but... what?
  3. It's said Orson Scott Card just based this philotic science off of Mormon doctrine, so the entire thing could be seen as propaganda. The stuff with Ua Lava I can see that a little, but I don't remember anything in Sunday School Class where it talked about twining to the center of your planet through vibrations of love. Must have missed that part.

THE UGLY:
  1. The subterfuge scene where Si Wang-mu and Aimaina Hikari have the humility contest, each trying to out-humble the other to show themselves as being the more respectful, would be the single coolest scene in the film if done right (even cooler than the bits with Admiral Lands.) It would also be the most difficult if not impossible to translate to screen.
  2. More grounded scenes like that, balanced against the philotic souls-bouncing-around-in-space scenes.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Flaming Building

   You, your child, your spouse, and your mother are trapped in a flaming apartment building. There's only time to save one of them, and... sigh. What... Why do... I mean, what's up with that? Never mind.

   And, by the way the "correct" answer is your mother, because you can always get remarried and pop out more babies, but you will only ever have one mom. See? It's ever worse. Thanks for asking.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Math Tools for Planet Worldbuilding

   Hey, look, it's Hugo-nominated, Nebular-winning sf/f author Eric Jame Stone's Gravitator gravity calculator for astronomical bodies! Just, you know, enter in the radius and relative density for the object you wish to calculate, and it spews forth the relative gravity and acceleration due to gravity! It's useful for, well, exactly that kind of thing. I guess. Want to know the gravity of a diamond the size of the earth, for, say, some kind of story in which your characters find a diamond the size of the earth? Easy! It's .64 Earth normal gravity. So, uh, now you know.

http://www.ericjamesstone.com/blog/home/gravity-calculator-for-astronomical-bodies-based-on-radius-and-density/

   And there's this tool I found, "Density of the Terrestrial Planets," which is sort of an educational exercise where you have to adjust the ratio of rock to iron core for the Earth, Mars, Mercury, Venus, and the Moon. It's useful for calculating the relative density of a planet based on its core composition.

http://www.mesacc.edu/~kev2077220/flash/planet-density.html

Sunday, October 6, 2013

Tom Cruise Day '13

   Tom Cruise day again! R0x0rs! This year's Tom Cruise Day comes with a movie recommendation, which I was really going to do the first time but got held up by the news of Jack Reacher. (How was that, by the way? Any good? Are they planning any sequels yet?)

   Knight and Day. It's a rom com, really, at its heart. Except the comedy here comes from playing with some of the more absurd tropes of the spy thriller genre, instead of wherever the heck the comedy is supposed to come from in normal rom-coms. The humor is really mature (no, not that kind of mature.) I mean, mature, like, it's... like a good cheese, or something. Tom is really free to crazy it up, which is one of the things that he does best. Some terrific action. Which would make it a great date film or something. Something in it for everyone.


   And I found the entire thing with way-off, Urdu-dubbed audio on YouTube! Oh, internet. Is there anything you can't do?

Saturday, October 5, 2013

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, October 4, 2009

Click to embiggen.

TRANSCRIPT:
(Editor's Note: The Author wasn't able to meet the deadlines for this week's strip, so we have decided to offer you this cobble of all our favorite Thespis moments!)
(We hope it represents the Nietzschean subtext of the the strip without delving into the über-ipissimosity of the conceptual apparatus columbarium. In
Collin: fact, the "boy" in the name El Niño refers to baby Jesus, as the phenomenon was first reported around Christmastime by Peruvian fishermen in the late 1800s.
Marvin: Christmas Jones.
Collin: !
Marvin: It's...
Oohh, Never Mind!
Collin: I LIKE COOKIES!
Marvin, thinking: Yep, I'm definitely crazy.
Collin: Yo!
That's messed up.
Editor's Note: (On second thought, Nietzsche is over-rated.)

NOTES:
   I've changed my mind about Nietzsche since I wrote this, by the way. He was actually a pretty cool dude. I also would have used some different psychobabble had I wrote this strip nowadays. Well, had I wrote this strip nowadays, I wouldn't have even written it, as I realized that I had a deadline to do a strip and was in no position to draw and scan a new one, so I had to whip up a new one entirely using old strips and Paint. Later on I wouldn't care about missing deadlines so much. Keep an eye on those. They will be missed.

Friday, October 4, 2013

ENDER'S SHADOW

   We see the events of Ender's Game from the perspective of Bean. So brilliant, yet so simple.

THE GOOD:

  1. The closest to Ender's Game in terms of tone, and a lot of other things. The other books aren't very like Ender's Game at all.
  2. A sweet mystery going on meanwhile, back on earth.


THE BAD:

  1. By the time they get about making this, Aramis is going to be... not little. Special effects, I know. And his rapid development actually becomes a plot point in the rest of the books. But this takes place the same time the first one did.
  2. There's another one, which is actually more problematic than bad, so I'm putting it in "ugly."


THE UGLY:

  1. How to make this seem different enough from Ender's Game to make it not seem like blind repetition? It does take place at the same time in much the same location, using the same scenes but from a different perspective.
  2. The twist. It's no longer a twist. The problem in this lies on what they decide to do with the film of Ender's Game, and is not in itself problematic.


Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Patheticisms pt II: Unoriginality is A-okay!

   I'm not sure how I feel about that sort of pseudo-deepness you see a lot of in forums and blogs and, liner notes for webcomics, and these kinds of blogs. (Amateur blogs, of which, this is, you know, one, so I'll try not to get self indulgent/high and mighty, making out like I don't do that at times.) I'd been going to put "ie, strongly dislike" as a parenthetic after "not sure how I feel about," but I'll just let it stand for itself; I'm not sure how I feel about it. Pseudo deepness. It sounds pretty, as long as you have your brain switched off. If not... It's painful. Sort of, aww, cute, look, it's trying to form a coherent thought. It thinks it's people. With any form of expression, you have some who can navigate better than others, of course- some people, as well, aren't good at expression at all, so I give them a kudos or two for trying (kudos is singular! I know, isn't that surprising?) Even if you're super eloquent, though, and especially if you're not, well, you don't need to be. Ninety-nine percent of the stuff in the world has already been commented on after some fashion or another.

   That's why you don't always share your own beliefs and opinions, and don't always need to. You go with other peoples'. It would be helpful if you also agreed with them, of course, but even if you don't level 100% with them (and, once again, especially if you don't) you can also add your own commentary, advance the dialogue to your own degree of contribution (and even advance the dialogue by "contributing" something that someone else has already written.) It helps to source carefully and everything, too, looks more impressive if you admit that that sizzling slice of bacon ain't yours.

   How can deference make you look good? The better question is, why does it- and I've got a few reasons I came up with:

  1. It proves you know things about the scientific and/or literary greats, even enough to quote them and/or reflect an understanding of their views,
  2. It's less painful-- if not for you than certainly your audience; instead of having to come up with your own stuff and how to phrase it, just lift from someone else (once again, making sure to cite properly!) Why? because...
  3. They're (ostensibly) professionals, which means that they've had time to do that thinking while using a lot of different support and have managed to form a superior opinion. You haven't had that time, and also enjoy being lazy.
  4. Deference shows humility.

   Just cop someone else's that you know might be good, instead of go with your own stuff you suspect might be bad! Said the one who wrote this.

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Patheticisms pt I

   I can't tell which is more pathetic... Well, not "pathetic," because that coveys too much pejorativism which isn't my intent at all, but, but... Pathé. That's the name of that, what, film company or something, right? (I think they distributed Chicken Run.) Whatever. It's a good word. Pathé. Which is more pathé. This is a written medium, so I realize that I've got time to look up the proper word and come back and continue this whenever and you wouldn't even notice or mind, but, I kind of like that.

   So. I cannot tell which is more pathé: blogs or forums. Speaking of electronic media here (and kind of having a breakdown for being a blogger) but it doesn't have to be; doesn't matter the medium. "Forum" is a good word no matter the medium for what I'm trying to get at, but the other guy-- lone commentators, not per se speaking as part of a larger community, only reacting when it serves his interests, that kind of thing-- I'm not sure if there's an intrinsic word for the concept, but compared against "forum" I think you can catch my drift. Forums, there's a community; blogs, there's, that thing I just said. The internet is a "flat" medium, meaning here, one that most anyone can access, and with content that ostensibly can be accessed equally (net neutrality politics aside- we're focusing on the web as ideally "flat," here.) In such a flat medium, is it better to be anonymous or visible? Or is that at the heart of the idea of the internet or any other flat space, taking away the third parties, as with the direct distribution market?

   So it comes down to the old apparent dichotomy, depth versus breadth (I say "apparent" dichotomy because I'm not sure if it really is or not- I haven't seen anything contradicting the notion, but I'm not about to make such a broad sweep on that alone.) Depth versus breadth- my own stance is, hey guys balance is nice, which seems to do me fine so far.

   A forum, you get to see this community in action, and get to see different minds coalesce, argue, joke. Argue. Blogging, on the other hand, is more, focused. A core sample taken from a tree (or... something. That's a good metaphor, right?...) In a forum, to see one individual's viewpoint you have to dig more to see within a post the allusions to past posts a poster has made, right? They're just one of the voices there, versus on something more personal like a web log, where it's primarily about their voice, so it'd be more worth it to invest in such an expenditure. And easier. Even with microblogging.

   ...Especially with microblogging.

   Why pay attention to someone when it's about their voice? We're fascinated by celebrities, aren't we. You don't mind listening to a speaker if you think the speaker is in some way talented. It's good to see that these people have lives, you know? You feel happy for them. It's good to see that they're living, or still alive, at least. We get something directly out of it; it benefits us in some way.

   Forums and comments boards can be a fine fine thing, providing you're interested in the subject (and really, why would you be anywhere if you weren't?) Such a wide variety can be fascinating. It can also be full of flamewars and arguments that quickly make you lose hope in humanity. The worst a blogger can do is make you lose hope in that one blogger, unless you perceive them to be holding an opinion congruent with the views of wider humanity-- (people are scum, except when they're not.)

   Speaking more generally now, in the wider "blogosphere" it is once more about combined opinions, but some would find the amount of time it takes to get the gamut to be a bit excessive. Microblogging comes back in here- it's a really nice balance. Hey guys, we found a really nice balance.

   And I'm done here.