Christmas Card 2015, Plus, Plus More Christmas Stuff (Plus Zootopia Watch)

   The Christmas card coloration is WIP (values, 100% always comes down to values... colorimetrically speaking.) Which I'm surprised at; I guess I didn't think I was honestly going through with it?

   In the spirit of getting something up to show you, though, I figured I'd get some draft art for the card up for you as I did last year. It's far better than it has any right to be going without references for any of it, and I'm hey! kinda proud of this stuff too (though not so proud as to post up the full page of sketches I did for it.)
And here, way G-er rated than I made the concept sound yesterday, she blows.

Though, yeah, actually pretty PG (THINK UPON INNOCENT THINGS.)

   Speaking of reference sketches, I also drew many of those, regarding lagomorph anatomy and Moon... physiognomy?, which I only now, after all this scanning, realize there is also there potentially to look at-- but what the heck, you know what rabbits look like already; it was only important in the process (they're a lot tougher to draw than they look, and it was a  special (and delightful) challenge to conform an at-least-quasi-realistic and plausibly viable bunny anatomy mapped onto the lunar surface. I fudged it with the ears, but you've got to sacrifice something.)

   Meanwhile, a dang review of Christmas! I'm feeling generous I suppose?? 'Cept, these things are always so awkward 'cos you feel like a jerk describing only what you got instead of what you gave... and the only gifts I gave this year went to someone spending their Christmas a state away in Arizona, (which I've only ever set foot into as far as the Hoover Dam, and which reliable HUMINT relays doesn't even celebrate Daylight Savings.)

   Most of my parents' money for me was spent getting me a laptop for college (yes, my parents. If it weren't for the stockings I'd say Santa appears to have skipped our house this year... conspiring with the Easter Bunny on the visitation lists, no doubt.)

   (An obvious joke; Easter Bunny is non-canon.)

   My brother did handle SQUIRREL YOU KNOW IT'S TRUE, and that's, just, more than enough. Do you want to know how enjoyable it is? THIS IS HOW ENJOYABLE IT IS.

The more I look at this photo, the more Asian I think I look.

   Friggin', I had no idea I was being photographed here till I saw it on my mom's blog; that smile is totally unstaged (which is weird, as I'm still only on the first page here which isn't even that great compared with the rest of it.)

ZOOTOPIA WATCH

   Shoehorned in just to get the word "plus" into this post title a third time, because I can. I had to look up to see if there was any news?

   Closest thing I can come up with is from the Zoo Year countdown Tumblr, this post, where... it seems like each species gets their own Vanity Fair equiv? And Vanity Fur is the, trans-species edition? (Trans-species here meaning, across all species, the notion of theria having their own therians can be dealt with later.) And Gazelle is the pop culture star to unite us all? A star we can all gather under? A... Christmas star?

   .Well, alright!

Christmas Card 2015

   Had a hard time coming up with this year's annual Christmas card... I made a bunch of sketches at 2:00, 3:00 in the morning today mostly dealing with this idea, that bunnies are basically elves, right? With the ears and all-- so I had an idea for, a rabbit elf? Who was also a, um, pole dancer? Yep, scraping the bottom of the barrel with that one; it didn't get very far.

   (Also as an idea: bearded lady Santa, with the beard doubling as clothing? Not a bad idea, but continuing to steer clear of implied nudity...)

   The bunny thing still had potential, and it wasn't until just a couple of hours ago, spotting the moon and realizing, oh yeah, first full-moon Christmas since '77, that everything clicked. There is a rabbit in the moon, and it's not every year that you get this opportunity to do a full-moon-themed Christmas card. (and in fact I'm not sure I caught when the next time this is happening, is...)

   There you go. It's black and white, kind of bland; I'm still proud of it, but I also figure I could do a paint job for that later on. Good for now.

Today marks the 15th anniversary of the first use of the word "meeple." The more you know.

Popular Culture

   Here it is, the Halloween short story for 2015. It's a bit long, actually, so I decided to put it on its own page, instead of in the post body like I usually do...

http://dielikeadisneyvillain.blogspot.com/p/popularculture-themachine-of-death-can.html

   Enjoy!

Spooky Story 2015

   Tomorrow's story, the annual spooky short story, will be my original story submitted (and rejected!) from Machine of Death volume 2. Makes me happy.

   It's called POPULAR CULTURE, and it takes place in the near future. It's about, well, it's a Machine of Death story, and so it's about what any other one of those is... a machine that lets you know, with 100% accuracy, how you will die. Yep, yep, just like the blog header.

   It's not as overtly spooky as last year's story was, but wasn't intended to be... It's still a MoD story...

   I'm not sure how good it is. The twist ending isn't much of a twist, but then again it's neither much of an ending. I'm alright with it; what it did well I'm very proud of. I suppose I'll let it speak for itself, so, shutting up now.

Rejection

   The application for BYU Provo (main campus) finally came back. The... application? The acceptance letter. Or rejection letter. Whichever. The announcement. And, which whichever it was, well... They were awfully kind, and I was actually... relieved? 

   Provo actually has a graphic design major-- Rexburg turns out has the arts major with graphic design focus, either as a BA or a BFA. If I wanted (and I'm considering it?) I could change my focus even within my proclaimed major, take whatever class I want, but... my point here-- the focus of this post-- why I'm even bringing this up, all has to do with that: Provo, rejection letter, relieved actually, it's like some kind of world of possibilities being in a smaller pond. 

   Malcolm Gladwell writes in David and Goliath how sometimes it's better to be a big fish in a small pond than a small fish in a big one-- how it can be better to go to a less-prestigious university. Would I still make this choice, to attend BYU-I, even if I were accepted to Provo? It'd be nice to be accepted to Harvard and blow them off, but this is BYU, anyway. At least the animation department is prestigious there, but that's not my intended major anyway, and any animation education to potentially suit my needs fits just as well in Idaho.

   Rejection feels nice. I've been rejected formally a few times, not nearly enough. Mostly in writing, those stories shipped off and slapped down. 

   But it feels awesome to be rejected. I just realize this now-- I need to be rejected more often. But to be rejected means to ship around, and to ship around means to have a manuscript, and to have a manuscript means to have a manuscript written. And writing is not my favorite hobby. It is the one I feel most satisfied by. But it is not my favorite.

   How satisfactory would it be to be rejected? That's the process, the whole process, the system, how everything works: write crap, mail it around, get rejected. Repeat. Success is an accidental part of the program. Though we'd be lost without it.

Laser Pointers

   I've never actually played laser pointer with the cat till now. It was quite... undramatic. It did notice the laser pointer dot eventually, tracked it with its eyes but I don't think ever attempted pouncing on it. And sniffed the pointer itself later on. But it did work. Not that well, but it did.

   Don't they notice how the dot disappears when they're blocking the line? How does it work? We amuse ourselves by watching them chase after the dot, oblivious to the lack of physicality (indeed, lack of physicality is one reason the chase succeeds so well- there's no physical feedback of having "caught" anything, so huntmode continues indefinitely.)

   We're amused by their oblivion-- oblivi-? obliviousness, at least-- but what if we're the oblivious ones? Think about it- exactly like the laser points, flicking in and out, cats glide through past the edges of our sensation, coming into view randomly. Like the laser points, we follow them, mindlessly, amused. When we've caught them, they slip away like water.

   So I'm thinking, what if cats themselves are laser pointer dots to us, cast by fourth- or fifth-dimensional beings for their amusement as we foolishly chase the illusory?

Talk Like Ben Stein Day '15!

   On this Ben Stein day, I wanted to do something somehow related to winning Ben Stein's money? Ride of the Valkyries played during the end theme to that show, so I figure that today, we're going to get our Ben Stein on...

   obliquely.

   Hmm... maybe one of these days...

(

   Hobby Lobby is a magical land. This actually has nothing to do with this post, but I couldn't let the post go by without bringing that up at least once.

   Went to Five Guys Burgers and Fries yesterday. Anyway. It was everything I'd ever heard of it: endless complimentary peanuts, and bottom buns that fall apart as you try to eat. Are basically the only two things I've ever heard about the place.

   ...

   The reason the bottom buns fall apart is a topic of serious debate in certain circles. You know... probably. Are you ordering too many toppings? Does it have to do with the tinfoil they wrap the burgers in? Is the bread just shoddily made? Or is it because the burgers are just that juicy; and if so, is "juicy" just a euphemism for "incredibly greasy?"

   Here is not the forum to moot such a topic of so great a portent. All of this is actually tangential to my topic as well. Though it does bring me to it.

   What nobody ever told me about Five Guys, is their great taste in background music over the speakers. (C'mon, I mean, as we arrived, they were playing early '80s U2!) The thing is, though...

   At one point, "Layla" by Eric Clapton's Derek and the Dominoes started playing. Started playing, and... I don't know. There was the sing-y part,  which ended and went into the piano part, but I'm not sure if that part ever ended. It's like, the outro bit never happened. It must have moved on to other songs, but, that's not how it seemed. It seemed like all that followed, and continues to follow, is still an extension of that song. Exactly like a giant, open parenthesis, that has yet to resolve...

Mythology Wednesday: Arcas

   Callisto was a nymph, daughter of Lycaon, king of what is now Arcadia. She bore a son, Arcas, to Zeus (because, who else is going to be anybody's father?)

   More crazy transformation stuff here- she gets turned into a bear in one of those wacky sitcom-style spats that Greek mythographers just loved to write about. Arcas's father prevents Hera from doing the same to Arcas, and puts him in the Greek Mythological equivalent of the witness protection program/adoption system (which Zeus himself, incidentally, was part of when he was a boy, I recall from a wholly unrelated myth.) King Lycaon gives Arcas up as a human sacrifice, and that's where things get REALLY interesting...

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On Accounts

   I finally ended the "will they or won't they" with TV Tropes yesterday, and made the relationship official by getting an account. I'm a troper now, officially, which give me mixed feelings but "never miss the opportunity to do something you'll regret later...!" If Randall Munroe, who's generally accepted to be awesome (though depending on whom you ask there's also that sense of smug superiority, which I'll let slide) can admit that he's addicted to TV Tropes and Cracked, then, yes, I will say it too. I am proud to say, however, that for the past 3-4ish months, I've been almost entirely Cracked-free! The withdrawls aren't as bad as you'd expect.

   You know the way I got this blogger account on the same day as I got my Facebook, because, hey I've got a cyberpresence now anyway? Emboldened by this move, and fearing my wicked-sweet handle may get snapped up elsewhere, I also came within, somehow literal inches of getting a Twitter account as well. Turns out you need a cell phone to finalize getting your account for some reason, though, and still I'm quite happy not to have one of those, thank you very much. Even for emergencies.

   I mean, Kitty Genovese made it out just fine without those, didn't she?

   If anything, all I need is a pager. I think they meant cell phone, but all they put was "phone..." Does a pager count in such instances?

   I know, I could have just used someone else's phone number to be sure, and, I don't know, disabled the feature that automatically sends tweets to your phone, but before I did that I realized, why do I need a Twitter in the first place, and what the lanta would I tweet? The only reason I' keep my Facebook is (aside from the fact that I'm not the one who got it for myself but was given it by friends who wanted to "friend" me in VR as well as meatspace) so I have a place to store all the things I like in real life, and remember that I like them in cyberspace. (aah, yes, Dave Devries, the Monster Engine himself, yes... The Museum of Bad Art, quite good, quite good...)

   Meanwhile, is it even the best time to get onto Twitter? If Penny Arcade is to be believed, Joss Whedon-- the Joss Whedon, the one whose name is a measurement for how many people "follow" you-- has quit Twitter, because (according to PA) he was getting zergswarmed with hatetweets about Avengers 2. I'm not sure how accurate this is, as from what I've seen everyone on Twitter loved Age of Ultron, while it was on Tumblr that people caused controversy about some of the choices he made. Now, I'm not entirely sure I understand the mechanisms of TUMBLng-- it blogs and generates memes?-- but, I don't think it's connected to Twitter, is it? So, I don't know. I am regularly fascinated by the mechanics that operate a toaster, though, so I don't think I'm quite the man to comment on, anything, vaguely, technological.

   There's a tingle at the edge of anything you do in public, especially online. A fear. Quasianonymous forums can do that-- what if I do something noobish, and they can tell I'm a noob, and decide I'm not worthy of life, and track down my IP address and identity on the internet, and come to my house and murder me in the middle of the night? It sounds kind of ridiculous when put that way, but would seriously make a good horror movie if done right: kind of far-fetched, but based off a common enough experience so as to be seriously "it could happen" freaky. Beyond the idea of being murdered bysstrangers in your sleep (which plays into common human vulnerabilities) it taps into deeper vulnerabilities and fears as well: what if I'm inadequate, what if they don't accept me. What if I mess up and I'm the only one who doesn't realize it, and everybody mocks me.

   Frightening stuff, no?

   Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to dally with the toaster.

Bat Logic (plus Zootopia Watch)

   Today I've been researching (and, like, totally not randomly slacking, but doing genuine research, gosh!) reading a lot about the Riddler in general and especially in the old Adam West Batman show, how silly it always gets whenever the Riddler is involved. Boy oh boy. Deduction of the riddle of the week always involved suspension of all known laws of logic in the string of associations it took to stop the guy... As from the 1966 movie:

   We've discovered a string of puns that tenuously could lead to either Riddler, Joker, Catwoman, or the Penguin. Well, clearly, it's all of them then, and they're all working together! Clearly.

   This theory turns out to be 100% correct. 

   Sure, it would have been nice to have some additional clues, like a little sticky note attached to that exploding shark that said, "also, guess what, the location of this attack stands for the name of someone behind this," but it looks like the detective skills The Batfamily are so great, they didn't need it. Maybe there was a note but they never said in the film, I don't know...

   There's a two-parter episode in season 2 where there's a newer bigger badder Riddler-type villain, The Puzzler, who's basically the Riddler up to an 11? Apparently there was a contract dispute with actor Frank Gorshin during season 2, so they immigrated this minor Superman villain over for Bats to fight as a Riddler clone, but they took it and ran with it, so, up to an 11. How bad? His whole clue is just the word, "puzzles." Euh. "This'll really make them put on their thinking caps," he cackles. Not an exact quote I don't think, but it's got to be true, because the Puzzler's clue somehow leads to a balloon factory or some biz, and the Caped Crusader and the Boy Wonder manage to figure it out. When, I repeat, the whole clue is just the word "puzzles." Which is, well it made my brain hurt how even the '60s Caped Crusader could figure that one out.

   Later, AND THIS IS AN ABSOLUTELY TRUE STORY, I was washing my hands and found myself casually trying to figure out what Puzzler did mean by "Puzzles." Puzzles... puzzles... jigsaw puzzles? puzzle pieces... piece together... piece together what? and I realized it was just random arbitrary word association from then out, once I'd made it that far and even before then, and once again it would really be helpful to have some kind of guidelines (like the above mentioned sticky note) to let me know if I was on the right track. At least provide me with the number of layers deep the word association should go, Puzzler! Wait a minute... Layers deep... Inception! Tom Hardy... No, no, no. That's not even part of the original clue! Dang it, Puzzler, now you've got me doing it. Doing it... babymaking... storks... Vlassic pickles! Oh, crap. And at that moment, I realized that I couldn't stop. Can't stop... can't stop... once you pop you just can't stop... Pringles! And Pringles stack... layers deep... nooo! 

ZOOTOPIA WATCH:
   According to the trailer, Zootopia is "from the makers of" Big Hero Six and Frozen, and I'm not sure if that means just Disney or not. All three directors were "creative leadership" on Big Hero Six, and codirector Byron Howard codirected Tangled, which is set in the same universe as Frozen, but...? Let's just assume that somewhere Frozen does fit into this, and not just Tangled, beyond just being the flavor of the decade. (Wreck It Ralph. They passed up on the opportunity to point out that Rich Moore directed Wreck It Ralph...!) It's kind of odd, though, and seeing Tangled conflated (?) with Frozen reminds me of Disney's trend recently to give their animated pictures names that can be interpreted both literally and symbolically.

"Rapunzel has severe mommy issues and feels tied down to her old life? Combine that with the hair motif and call it Tangled. The Ice Queen is emotionally stunted and needs to learn how to break free? Combine it with the snow motif and call it Frozen." -Dan Wells

   It's a pretty big trend (click on that link for the full post, and be sure to check out the comments.) If Brave, Frozen, Tangled et al. all have symbolic titles, why not Zootopia?

   ...To be sure, I'm kind of puzzled as to what that word could be symbolic to mean, but still... it'll probably all become clear once the movie comes out.

Reconciliations Are Made

   Since my mission, serving "the Happiest Zone on Earth" and attending all the numerous appropriately themed parties, I'd kind of had it to the gills with Disney-- even occasionally regretting naming my blog and theming it as I did (TOTALLY FAIR USE, THOUGH, PLEASE DO NOT SUE.) 

   Can't say what it was for certain: the experience of watching fully grown adults devolve into children before my eyes, the beyond-11 levels of awesome approaching some kind of hard-to-describe inanity-of-fun in a family-friendly toxic sugar rush of partying, the fact that I very rarely won any scavenger hunts...? Whatever it was, it just, turned me off, sometimes. Turned me off from Disney. It happens; I once read of a girl who can't stand Cat Stevens anymore after boarding with hippies one time (I think she made a comic one-shot of it on DeviantArt, so totally not making it up.)

   And, funny thing, all this time I haven't been sure if I've gotten over that. 

   But...

   Wha-? Wel--... Mm.. my goodness.

   You know what I said earlier, about getting sued? I take it back.

   Have all my money, Disney.

   Have all my money right now.

TV

 Grandparents anyway. I told you that we're back from there, but I hardly told you about what happened in Oregon. Well, then. I've got three words to say on that subject, regarding my maternal grandparents.

   They've got DirecTV.

   Holy crud was it an eventful week in television. I was there to see American Pharoah make horse racing history (by so many lengths it was anticlimactic.) I was there for the epic climax of a long Adventure Time arc (and I'm still trying to process how lumpin' epic it was. The callback at the end with the fish saying how it would "croak" out there- I sat in stunned silence for, like, fifteen minutes.) I was there for... shoot, the season premiere of Next Food Network Star?

   Why not!

   There were also a bunch of other shows premiering as well, of course, which on one hand does dissuade me from the theory that maybe we hit TV at sweeps week, but on the other hand I don't care much about. Remember Summer of 2012 when I burned myself out trying to keep up with all the new network shows coming out? I realized  a lot of shows don't make it past one season, and television follows Sturgeon's Revelation just like everything else, I stopped paying attention to those (except for when Hannibal came out) (and Blacklist.) You can almost never tell the eventual success or quality of a show from such early efforts as the first season. Even trying to avoid the self-fulfilling Firefly effect... well, anyway. Food Network Star is an established program, so, yeah all right.

   I'd forgotten how nice it is to have satellite broadcasting, and though we hardly hit any yard sales (that's a different post entirely) I'd count last week as a success on the amount of TV we got in alone (and the sugar, but, also a different post.)

   Yes, I highly doubt that all weeks on television are as eventful as last week was, though this week is shaping up to be pretty tanjin' eventful as well, with this Saturday hosting not only Phineas and Ferb's series grand finale but also Friendship is Magic hitting its (very important) 100 episode milestone. And probably some other stuff as well, but c'mon, you know none as great as the stuff I just mentioned.

Back from Vacationland (100/100 Split)

   There is, as of this post, exactly an even hundred/hundred split between backlogs, the Hundred Things during my mission and the hundred posts not put up because I've just been lazy and went without posting after it. Without posting. Not without writing. It's really more of a dearth of, editing the post ideas I do have, than having them in the first place.

   Although even that still left a lot of planned posts unwritten.

   We got back today from Oregon, which I haven't told you about till now because hey guys we're all out of the house for the next week, come right on by and steal whatever you want, but, we're back, and the cat's still alive, and we're all good, and we can tell you about it now.

   You know the AlphaSmart, though? I'm a mad gambit-planning genius. There's a, however dang long, car ride up there (hours and hours,) which I realized could be spent on more than just getting deeper into whatever books I'd picked up from the library (and had to renew over telephone being out of town by the time they were due.) Writing in the car could be accomplished with just a pen and a pad of paper, but that writing would have to be transcribed later (and I know, from my mission, what a pain transcription can be (though that's not one of my Hundred Things.))

   So I masterfully set up a major plot (read: swung by on errands I was doing anyway) arranged to grab Cailin's old AlphaSmart in town, so that I'd be able to write in electronic form during the car ride there and back. Between TTDRCBA and here, I managed to crank out, maybe, 1 1/2 AlphaSmart max-sized files... I plan on getting this batch of hundred up by the end of the month. It's still going to require a lot of fact-checking and editing, but... (man, I don't care if nobody reads this anymore; I've got standards! and at least it allows me to get a bit more experimental with my posts, since nobody's going to call me out on anything...)

On Talking Bunnies

   Caught some Sophia the First a couple of days ago to finally see what all the hype is all about (this probably tells you a lot more about me than you'd care to know, but apparently I define "hype" by the number of coloring books are about something.) From coloring books, it appears that it's traditional hand-drawn, but it's not even that; it's CG. And I'd always thought from the tie-in junior novelizations that there's a guest Disney princess who stops by at the end of every episode who delivers some platitude, but from what I've seen they don't even have that, so I don't know where that comes from.

   What they do have is Tim Gunn. Tim. Gunn.

   And Wayne Brady, so hold on.

   I was watching, like, this show's not all that great, thinking of maybe not even getting through a whole episode, when Sophia's bunny spoke up and it was the most majestic beautiful sound I've heard in my life. "Oh my gosh, bunny," I found myself saying. "Say something again." I saw during the end credits Tim Gunn plays Bailiwick, and Wayne Brady did... something, maybe at least miscellaneous voice acting, which is common for bigger-named voice actors to do from time to time so I didn't think that much of it. Aside from, of course, Wayne Brady how awesome is that. I had to stick around for a few more episodes until someone called the majestically voiced bunny by name (Clover, apparently) so that I knew what name to look for when the end credits came around again.

   And the credits came around again.

   Wayne Brady. You glorious man. (He's on my shortlist, alongside Craig Ferguson and maybe one or two more people, of voice actors/comedians who are not only smart but also very probably geniuses.) I'm not saying that between him and Tim Gunn they make the rest of it worth sitting through, but... man, I'm even considering watching Food Fight --Food Fight!-- just because he voiced the chocolate squirrel thing that's on the cover, of all of the, coloring books...

5% of the Day

   Though 80% of my waking productive life yesterday was spent watching television and 15% was spent goofing off online, for some reason that last 5% was super satisfying and the day felt like a total win. What's 5% of 24 hours? That's, 1,440 minutes a day, so, 5% of that should be, 72, minutes... and I'm sure the stuff I'm thinking about took less time than that, by maybe just a little bit, so, less than five percent. But that five percent, man. Breaking it down, in case you want to, timestalk me, or something... that's, stalking THROUGH TIME, somehow; if you ever need to assassinate me in the past, well, here's my schedule:

   Woke up around 6:30. Got bunted from bathroom to bathroom until I could finally take a shower.

7:30-12:00: Watch Burn Notice and Leverage; good shows, so I wouldn't call this time a waste. WINNING. Probably eat something in here as well; I don't know. That's half of the entire day so far, and about a third of my time awake. My time spent on the internet, from here to 3:30 is generally aimless but also not a bust-- finished up the last of the YouTube creative writing class playlist first mentioned here, for one. And here's the good stuff.

   Cailin has an old Alphasmart, or, did have an old Alphasmart (or, CamelCaps? so, AlphaSmart?); she didn't need it anymore since she got a newer model, so she put up an open invitation for me if I needed it. Alphasmarts is how she does all of her fiction writing-- straight-up word processor, no distractions, so it's pretty nice, she says. We'll see. She writes when she's not doing, other things, I guess, like, her real job. I've been collaborating lately with her a bit on Persistence of Memory 5.0 but she's also got one or two other writing projects going on for when she needs a break from that, kind of thing.

   Planning to spend a bit of time on a road trip coming up, I decided yesterday to take him up on that. Ran into town to pick that up from him right before his 3:00-4:00 lunch break ended; we didn't have much time to chat, but. First face-to-face in a quarter-decade.

   And then I got Grandma and Grandpa's check for graduating deposited. And got stuff back into my savings account, so that it's not empty for the first time in two years almost to the day (don't. ask.)

   And then back home, more internets (or, um, moar, internets, because, yes, I spent my time here on that side of the web (being the side that spells like that.)) After that, I suppose I did take that long walk, so perhaps my period of "solid win" does extend to 5% of my day or more.

   And then I made popcorn chicken and watched a bunch of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.. Which was plenty better than I expected, with all the talk I hear about it about how it doesn't really have a direction of its own to head in and thus needs to be thrown into the wind to be tugged by the currents of whichever MCU film came out the most recently... It's even got a few moments that make you say, "holy crap this is a good show." Not as many as has, say, The Blacklist, where such a moment happens about every five minutes on average (with all the intrigue, not to mention James Spader, flyin' around,) but, Agents does have its share of moments. That being said, it can be kind of a mixed bag sometimes, but there's probably a website or some other tool out there that tells you whether any given episode is worth taking the time to watch or not...

   In case you're wondering: my three daily activities I listed a couple Tuesdays ago: television watching of course, but, also got in piano practice in between shows, and got in scripture study in the car running those errands. Solid. 80% of the day spent on those three daily things, 15% spent surfing the web, and those 72 minutes spent walking, banking and Alphasmarting, and that made that day even more solid.

   Put that way, with so much time goofing off, the day shouldn't have been that solid, right? But out of 24 hours, I've got it figured out, man. If just 5% of a day can make that day having been worth living, imagine what it would be like if you spent more than that amount of time spent pursuing a worthwhile goal...

Mythology Wednesday: Polyphonte

   Polyphonte was the daughter of Hipponous and Thrassa. Thrassa's father was Ares, god of war, and that's going to be important. Remember that now. Alright.

   Polyphonte was a total devotee of Artemis, and Aphrodite didn't like that very much. Being goddess of love, she figured she could totally mess with Polyphonte, though. If there is one thing that Artemis likes, it's wild animals, and if there are two things Artemis likes, it's wild animals and virginity, so Aphrodite totally realized, dude, I could make Polyphonte fall in love with, crap I don't know, a bear, and she and the bear would totally get freaky, and it'd be a twofer to break up the Artemis/Polyphonte sismance (which is like a bromance, but with girls?)...

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Mensiversary

   So much was spent the day before yesterday focused on how I'm graduated and everything, and how this blog reached the 1,000 post milestone, that I totally overlooked another milestone. I'm not entirely certain that it's a "milestone," actually, but it's an anniversary, or, half of one... It's just a couple of days off now, this post, but I'd totally spaced how the 19th also marked the advent of being home off of my mission for half a year. The 20th was the first full day, but yesterday 6-months-after-that was a Wednesday, which means myths, and though I could have posted about this six month mark yesterday I figure myths are appropriate enough, coming from my mission anyway, and all.

   Mensiversary? Like anniversary, from the Latin, but with months instead of years? My spel czech isn't red-flagging it, so, hey! Mensiversary works.

   Here'd be traditionally the part where I talk about being home for half a year, and how it feels, and how home life differs from my mission life... and how one quarter of the people back on the mission have never met me, by now...

   And here's the part where I either shrug that off with some lame excuse, or follow through with that promise. Hoo boy.

   It comes down to expectations, of course. Expectations of now, from then. If it were only that, though, you figure I'd be a lot less hesitant to tackle the subject, with which I am quite comfortable, thank you very much, so either I just lied to you there or it must be something else. What I think it is, it's not really anything that I haven't covered at least briefly elsewhere... and if I wanted to go deeper, I'd have to go, a lot deeper. Like, not likely to be covered in a single post, deeper.

   Who's ready to get angsty?

Open Field

   Let me start out with what has to be the quote of the day. Not that today hasn't been filled with some excellent quotations, but I've got this one within easy copy/paste reach, and it's applicable to the topic at hand (being how, it's been quite a bit longer than two years, but, I received my two-year degree yesterday and am now I suppose a graduate of more than just compulsory education.) Here, plucked from the heart of correspondence with old companions still on the mission, it is for you now:

   The open expanse of life sits before you with no limits or bounds, and opportunity around every turn, except I already called it an open expanse didn't I? Not too many turns in a flat field... well, opportunities all over the place then. You'll just have to build something to turn by for them to be around. That way life will be more interesting than a field. 

   It kind of reads like the back of a Dominion box, doesn't it? My goodness. It would probably be more powerful imagery just keeping the first... two, sentences, but the remainder is pretty crucial too, and, anyway! Yes. That gem is from Elder Rose there. I've tried to respect the identities of people on the mission, refraining from naming names except in specific cases like all the blogs I linked to where it's a matter of public record anyway.* Mentioning Elder Rose by name is unavoidable, however, considering, reasons. Expect more from (and with!) him in the future...
 
   It was almost a month ago, but still just a couple of posts at press time, that I was explaining how now that I had 1,000 posts and wasn't holding myself back internally from posting, I could get on more blogging of things I'm thinking about anyway, being barred only by external, um, entities. Quite a few of those lately with finals and all, but that's all over. I just kept thinking Sunday evening how there were no online discussions that I needed to respond to on selected assigned readings...

   There are still a few things I'd really rather like to get done before cranking out polished backlog hardcore... What is on this list? In no particular order:

1. Ward membership clerk duties.
2. Application for further educational pursuit.
3. Journal backlog (non-blog.)

   Those are larger, more major goals. Clerk duties are most important to the present; college application is most important to my future; journaling is most important to my past. All of them need to be done. Probably set aside a day to work on them, or find a few hours in a day to make some major chipping away at them. Big obstacle: procrastination. If these things can be done at basically any time, why not just keep them on one's chest indefinitely? On top of those, there are the things I try (and generally succeed) to make time for everyday anyway:

1. Scripture study.
2. Piano practice.
3. Copious amounts of television watching.

   Why am I so successful at these things and not the longer-term stuff? I can see how I manage to fit watching cartoons into my day, even if it is for hours at a time, but, the other two? I think it's because those can be in chunks as large or small as I want, and so they don't require much apparent commitment to do them. Which isn't how I view blogging, or journaling, or clerking, to my detriment.

   It's been a pretty big post so far, so I think I'll wrap it up here, right before recapitulating the main theme in a satisfying way and/or getting to the meat of the issue, as I am maddeningly wont to do...

To Forge a Realm (POWER GRID Problems)

   The "To Forge a Realm" game expansion for "Kingsburg," by Stratelibri and Fantasy Flight Games, arrived today. Five new modules are added to the base game, including not only new rows of buildings to build along the technology tree, but additional rows that you can choose to replace preexisting rows, variable player powers, special conditions, and an all-new system of determining reinforcements at the end of the year when the kingdom is besieged by dangerous threats. So much variability is added to the game.

Behold. (Via Fantasy Flight Games.)

   Kingsburg is a great game, but, I wouldn't be making a post just on it if there weren't a "but." Kingsburg is a great game, but there's really not much in the base set to prevent it from getting stale. The same stuff happens each game, each season... you influence the king's advisers, you collect your resources, you build your buildings, and you fight your monsters. The only thing that changes from game to game is which monsters come at the end of the year, and there's only so much variability in those. You can choose to build your buildings in a different order, sometimes you roll poorly, and sometimes people influence advisers that you'd like to have been the one to influence for the season (which requires you to modify your strategy,) but other than that each game plays out the same.

   That's what Alex says baffles him about the popularity of the game "Power Grid": once you've played one game of it, you may as well quit, because there's not really much replayability. Different maps you can choose to play with, sure, and different orders of opportunity with which the power plants present themselves, sure, but the game remains basically exactly the same, with replay value next to nil. He'd be happy to play if someone else owned the game, but he'd never consider buying a copy for himself. As light-and-casual yet strategic Kingsburg is, it suffered from the same problems as Power Grid: the underlying strategy is always going to remain static from game to game, with little thought needed how to achieve victory.

   With Kingsburg: To Forge a Realm, though, after one game (and not even all of the modules!) it was clear that Kingsburg was jumping up back to its previous high position on Alex's list of his top tabletop and cardgames (it had slipped lower and lower as he became aware of the replayability issue.) It's even getting higher now than it previously had been.

   So yeah.

On: The Kind of Stuff We Mormons Watch

   When I first got home from my mission, the first thing I watched (besides, like, Scott Sterling getting his face caved in, which had come out only a day or two before I'd come home) was, well, you could probably guess what I would have wanted to watch first.

   It was Ender's Game.

   The first movie I actually watched, though, was Catching Fire, because there's a trailer for it on the Ender's Game DVD-- and I saw that it was on Netflix, and I wanted to catch it before it disappeared like Netflix movies do sometimes (for those of you counting, though, yep, it's still there.)

   (The other YouTube videos I watched beforehand were the Hunger Games parody music videos, from the same dudes who brought you Scott Sterling, being BYUTV's "Studio C." So.)

   The first movie my brother who just got back wanted to watch-- well, it was The Saratov Approach, actually. The one about the missionaries who get kidnapped and held for ransom? (Which is... well, I suppose it's a decent enough choice for when you're off your mission...)

   And then we forced him to watch the LEGO Movie, because it's so awesome.

   And then he watched Ender's Game. Got around to it last night. So.

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, May 3, 2015

   Coming "soon."

Eldritch Horror Organization

   Fans of tabletop boardgaming can agree: Eldritch Horror is a pretty flippin' sweet game. Also, it's got like a grazillion pieces that you need to fit back inside the box somehow. Everyone's got their own system of storage. Usually it's fitting them all into their bags; I'm not sure how many people remove the standees from the standee bottoms, but that takes up a bit of valuable box room.

   The layout of the box, I should mention. This is how the box comes. It's such that there's a raised cardboard shape for the board to go, and a narrow valley down the middle that the pieces all must go in, underneath that, with cardboard slats from the bottom that can be used to give the game's card decks their own space at the ends with the baggies of chits and everything dumped in the middle.You'd better make sure that the baggies have the air squeezed out, to fit, and even then (if you're ingenuous and/or ingenious) you may want to shove some of the baggies in underneath the storage box standout.

   As such, it's not very surprising that some people opt to go for storage like this, this or even this or this, but, personally I find this unfair to the original box designers (unless... they'd intended us to come up with such solutions...)

   Is there no way to achieve both? Well, actually...

The myriad pieces required at various points in the game, once dumped into various baggies that only separated them fundamentally, could now be separated almost entirely uniquely (tickets, for example, we still just put into the same cubbie, and the miscellaneous bits like the omen track markers can go together as well.) The standees get put under the custom Fantasy Flight storage tray cardboard.

   The plastic container had been used to house dice for as far back as I can remember having dice that needed storing. The container is divided up into 6 bins, which is nice but we weren't really divvying the dice into categories at all and they didn't need to be separate in the first place. We dumped those into a ceramic handmade bowl.

Bonus points to those who can name the source of some of these dice? I guess

   Thanks be the fact that we're on a no-sweet program right now, there used to be sweets in the bowl but we put the dice in there since Mom emptied the bowl Tuesday-ish.

   The standees, those we put in the empty space underneath the cardboard box fold.

1,000 Things!

   Argh I've got like 1,000 things I need to share today! It's so exciting, but, uh, I'll try to organize my thoughts as cohesively as possible.

   RYAN IS HOME TODAY, for one. It's been two years since he set out on his mission, and today's the day he returns. Ho boy, mixed feelings! Though not really. I know exactly how trippy it's gonna be for him. It wasn't so long ago that I was the Elder Perazzo returning home from his mission. Almost half a year ago, you say? Gosh.

   But, yeah. Pretty major stuff! But my even talking about it raises a few questions-- namely: the last post I did was a couple of weeks ago, about my nephew being born, yeah (oh, congratulations; why thank you.) So, what, is this blog now only for major things anymore, like the births of nephews and the return of brothers, though my blogging used to be quite daily? Is it only a, serious event, what's-going-on-in-your-life type deal now, or what? That'd be fine if it were, but, actually that question brings me to a second point.

   THIS IS THE 1,000th POST PUBLISHED ON THIS BLOG, in case you weren't counting. Though, you know, not the thousandth day it's been around or anything, of course. This is the thousandth post ever posted, but with backdating posts and getting all the in-between stuff I don't have posts for, (the, missed a few days, thing.) I haven't been posting up my backlog which I've totally got like I should have, though I do have a bunch of posts written but not posted. They await only minor copyedits and the actual "go" signal, but, no, I haven't posted them. I could've let the quadruple digit mark happen sometime during backposts, but I've actually refrained from posting a lot of the material that I do have because, post 1,000, that should come in its own little package now, shouldn't it? I tend to dump these in chunks, and I totally might have missed it had I not been careful.

   I've been going through a lot of the old stuff, of course. The "new" Thespis strips, from a couple of years ago but only posted up now, that kind of thing. Old stories I've written, too. The story I submitted to Machine of Death 2. And... I can see now why I got the rejection letter. And, all the drawings I did, for Thespis and even, like, all of them I posted up on the blog, or most of them, and, they're terrible. Should I be pleased that I've evolved that much? Should I be ashamed that I once thought that that stuff might have been good? What's past is passed, and part of the reason I posted all that is to be able to see this evolution, so, I'll let myself suck. This is one of my points, so, I'LL LET MYSELF SUCK.

   We don't want success. We're afraid of success.  For, precisely the reason that, we're not ready. I'm glad I got rejected. It's a good thing.

   But, anyway, uh... Yeah, I think that's good.

A Cautionary Tale pt 2: Amazon

   Dang, thinking about what YouTube thinks of me, I've also got to wonder if Amazon thinks the same thing- I would have brought this up yesterday but there was no room for it, so I guess I can get into it here. That I would really want to...

   I was... on my mission when I signed up for my Amazon account... euh...

   Yeah, actually, no I don't think I'm comfortable with sharing that all with you at the moment. Suffice it to say (and you really should,) for a year there, all Amazon knew to advertise at me was pranks. Not like video of people getting pranked, like the YouTube stuff, but actual implements of practical jokes. Like fake plastic poops and crap.

   The fact that those YouTube videos also happen to be about pranks is a complete coincidence, of course. Honestly, the internet shopping thing wasn't even my idea to begin with...

YouTube: A Cautionary Tale

   YouTube keeps advertising videos at me. Which is alright, gotta keep up with the one channel I'm subscribed to, but there's always the videos it suggests that it thinks you might be interested in. Sometimes, it's brony stuff. Mostly...

   A few months ago, February 3rd according to the internet history which I'm going to trust as it matches up to having occurred on a Tuesday, looking up tutorials on how to fix washers, but apparently autoplay was on and the videos just kept on going, from the washer one to a second one and from there randomly jumping to prank compilations.

   This continued on for 5 1/2 more videos.

   And every week, when YouTube its scratching that artificially intelligent brain of its, trying to figure out what kind of videos it thinks I would be into, keeps on going back to the 45 minutes straight where funny prank video compilations were playing. The screen was off and the sound was down and we were having dinner, but YouTube has no way of knowing that. So when it wants desperately to please me, it proffers things like SEXY WOMEN FUNNY NAUGHTY PRANKS, or whatever. Because, that's the only thing I seem to have shown continued interest in.

   I know how easy it is just to delete that history from YouTube's databanks, but I'm leery of rewriting history just to make the present slightly less annoying.

Thespian Acquiescence, But More Importantly...

   A note on Sundays: seriously, new strips of Sunday strip Thespis are coming out, and I've got 5 or 6 already totally completed from a couple of years ago, leading up to the new storyline coming up. They're... somewhere, on the computer. And they totally exist! At press time, of course, we have none. No new strips of Thespis, posted up, right now, like I promised I would do on Sundays. They are coming, and hopefully the seemingly overly obvious explanation that they are not up right now will be necessary in the future, but for now, uh...

   The strips, these new old ones, are, turns out, on a file format that our PC no longer supports, so I need to find some way to transport the files to the laptop so that I can convert them there to JPEG. (OH, if there were only some means of doing so, like if they invented a portable drive of some sort...!)

   Last week being Spring Break at the local school district, however, even if we did have all those things that I promised you we still wouldn't have one today (such it is when you start a comic strip for high school distribution.) So we're free to have today's blog post deal with other issues. And all that explanation seems rather petty now, seeing the issue we'll be dealing with...

   It's weird, like it feels like this should be affecting me more than it is, but, 11:51 Utah time, weighing in at 9 lbs. 5 oz., I... well... I'm an uncle now. See me mother's blog for more stuff on that; this is a way bigger deal for her than it is for me (becoming a grandparent versus becoming an uncle, hmm, let's see...) but it's still, you know, okay, I guess...

   On my mission, one of the people I worked under, Rachel, her name is (or maybe it's Rachael, I always was spelling her name wrong in my journal...) she asked me one time if I had any niece's or nephews. She said that I've got a sort of certain, amiability, about me, and I suppose assumed it was avuncular? I had to answer no to her question of course, but, you know...

   Not that we've met yet or anything.

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, April 5, 2015

Click to embiggen.

TRANSCRIPT

Collin: What are you doing?!

Just look at yourself.

Look at the gifts you’ve been given.

Look at who’s given them to you.

Were you worth it?

Well, you were, but are you worth it now?

You can’t only be nice when it suits your purposes.

Trying to make you a better person through bribery? We knew it would never work, not really.

But there’s already this time and energy given to give you what you want.

All the labor costs, the multimillion dollar industry. Looking forward to the future. But you always go back to naughtiness.

Santa invests so much in you.

And you let him down each time.

Surf's Up Plus

   Going well back into the archives of the blog... The first post, actually; perhaps you'll remember it.
http://dielikeadisneyvillain.blogspot.com/2012/02/i-had-dream-once-where-if-i-ever-got.html
I posted up, well, it's just an anthropomorphized wolf thing with a surfboard and swim trunks. A drawing of one, rather (wouldn't the other one be so rad, though?) It seemed t' fit what I was going for...

   The next month, I came out with a digitally colorized version of the same, slapping over a translucent color layer in Photoshop. Still really early days stuff. Years ago.
http://dielikeadisneyvillain.blogspot.com/2012/03/surfs-up.html
I noticed in colorizing it (to whatever mild extent that I did; I suppose it was just my "style" back then) a couple of the mistakes I'd made; we all learned something and yay happy fun times.

   SO I'm not sure if it needed to be done, or whatever, but recently, a few weeks ago but far more recent than the other stuff, I assembled a new version based off of the original drawing; all digital this time (that is to say, even the "ink" layer is digital; traced over the original sketch.)

Click to... well, you know.

    If I noticed mistakes last dye job, it doesn't come close to the number I caught with this one (caught, but, released I suppose? I noticed it all but corrected nothing, anyway; it wouldn't be really the same drawing otherwise (arguments about what that constitutes in relation to having the drawing be traced over on a new layer notwithstanding.)) I suppose I should be happy? Means I must be getting better, after all...

X-Files, Rogue Nation, Tomorrowland (Oh, My...?)

   Well, originally this post had been going to be on the Tomorrowland movie Disney's doing, which I found out only today is a thing (I screamed. I screamed like a little girl.) Even if it turns out not to be that great, it's still going to be a goshdarn Tomorrowland movie, in the vein of the Haunted Mansion and Pirates of the Caribbean*, directed by goshdarn Brad Bird and starring goshdarn George Clooney and goshdarn Hugh Laurie. Oh, with a goshdarn script cowritten by Damon Lindelof, by the way. I'm not kidding when I said I screamed. If you don't need a change of pants after hearing that lineup, I don't know what's wrong with you. (Continence, probably.)

   Oh, and looking up Britt Robertson, who plays the main character, just now, it turns out that I do actually recognize her-- she played one of Dan's daughters in the wonderful, vastly underrated 2007 Steve Carell romantic comedy Dan in Real Life. So that's nice too.

   But the discovery that Tomorrowland is a thing comes on the heels of learning of the existence of the latest Mission: Impossible film, which is totally going to be the best of the lot (though, of course, I say that about every M:i installment.)

   And now it comes to my attention that Fox is starting the X-Files again after a hiatus of... shoot, does the "I Want to Believe" movie count in that...?

   So, yeah. I love these things. You love these things. That's all that can be said, really, and all that need be.

I Don't Consider Myself to be a Busy Person...

   I haven't actually posted anything really since my mom linked to this and the other blog on her blog... Officially, so far, it's been, uhh, twice, since she linked last, saying how it's one of the things I do. Twice. Euh. I totally have all the posts for the interim days planned out in my head, 80%ish, but... "School work keeps him from writing as much as he would like," yeah...

   I don't consider myself to be a busy person, but looking on it, I suppose I kind of am. At least during this school season. I have things to do. The true earmark of business, tell you what.

   I have yet another English paper due on Thursday (they just keep coming at me) and I want to get it in before the literal eleventh hour this time, so I've been working on that (Feb 5th 30-point paper: turned in 11:58 pm; March 1st special credit paper: turned in 10:42 pm; March 5th 100-point paper: turned in 11:54 pm; March 12th 30-point paper: turned in 11:53 pm.) Started reading the assignment today, which I'll finish tomorrow-- and I kid you not, I've actually started writing a bit about it. Here's the part where I make some witticism about procrastinating tomorrow instead of today, which occurred to me today, but there's no way to fit it into the English language that sounds nearly as clever as it initially did.

   With the baby coming up, as well, I've been spending a bit of time the last few days sewing up quilts and receiving blankets at my grandparents' house, learning how to do that n' all, and throwing a couple together... Begin at 9:00ish in the morning and break only for a late lunch, so it takes time, but, oh, it looks darling; it's a shame I don't have pictures for you at the moment.

   But, see, my day is packed full, with, those, uh...

   Two things. I consider that busy... (Only had, like, 12 hours of downtime today.)

Partials, U2, and Mormon Decency

   This is like my fourth time urinating today; why is there so much of it? And why is it coming out so clear? I remember drinking only a single cup of water today, but there must have been more in there...

   Anyway!

   Just finished Dan Wells's Partials, book 1 of the Partials Sequence. It's postapocalyptic YA scifi-- and it actually is all those things; it isn't until you stumble across something like this that you realize that those other post apocalyptic scifis for the YA crowd aren't really all that postapocalyptic, and only technically scifi. And stumble across this one, I did. Let me explain.

   Looking up *Ruins* to find OSC's Pathfinder 2, top results showed that it's also the name of Partials 3. Partials? What is this? Ooh, book trailers. And it's by Dan Wells? The Dan Wells? So I purchased a copy to download.

   And I'm not here to give you a review.

   Alright, maybe a little.

   Great if you like: 

• Strong female protagonists who are also minorities
• Institutionalised teen pregnancy
• (and thus) Real political conversations regarding fake politics
• Genetic engineering as the next nuke   

   Anyway. I had known of the books before, actually, turns out. There's this little post he did regarding U2 of all things, which I was of course all over and have been itching to have an excuse to share (it captures the roller coaster experience of attending a live U2 concert perfectly! Or so I'd imagine.)

   Oh, and it talks about Partials. Which totally confused me why he'd be talking about that, up until this point when I've actually read it.

   http://www.fearfulsymmetry.net/?p=1509#comments

   I'd recommend following that link if you're a fan of Dan Wells and/or U2, and wonder how they feel about each other.

   Even if not that, click on the link only to be sure to read the comments; BC Woods's seemingly unrelated one is easily one of my favorite things of all time (hey, the whole post is that as well.) In it, he talks about the attitude he used to have against Mormons, how he used to view us as polite robots with no understanding of human suffering, and how Dan Wells changed that: "you clearly understood what real darkness was and you were just a polite and decent person ANYWAY."

   Seriously, click that link.

My Records from Forever

   Today we had a bit of a run-in with law enforcement. Running across the street from cousins' to our place, to get shoes to play basketball, Alex ducked into the bushes. Passing police cars happened to spot him, and notice him not wearing shoes, in fact wearing only pajamas, and attempting to make himself scarce to get out of the way as the cars rolled by... Yeah. They figured he was a runaway, or something... I was inside as Alex breezed by, telling me that there was a police officer who would like to see me at the door.

   Oh.

   Act. Natural.

   We chatted. The officer asked me my name and Alex's, how to spell that, our relation, my age... writing this all down. The story of why Alex (who breezed back by with his shoes on) would be dressed as he was. Where our parents were at (Dancing with the Stars,) so that made me the babysitter technically... He drops his pen at one point, and I help him pick it up (apparently speaking in present tense now!) Talking with people isn't difficult. I was never nervous talking to girls until I learned that I should be.

   There's a scene in National Treasure where Riley tells Ben, dude they're gonna have your records from forever dude they're gonna have my records from forever. That feeling is here, to be honest, just a little bit.

   What are they going to do with these records? I'm thinking. My criminal records are... I'm clean, right? That (genuinely funny) near-86 at Wal-Mart, they don't record that kind of thing if it doesn't go all the way through, yeah? And, what about records higher up? Are they going to run me through an FBI database? Do they keep things like internet search history there?

   Oh crap. They're gonna find my web comics...

   The conversation (well, Q&A) wound (returning to past tense again) down, as another vehicle paused at the corner-- Grandparents' Prius. Paused, and rolled back, noticing the police vehicle in the driveway. I pointed them out. Blocking the driveway now, so there was no way the police would be able to escape a conversation with them. I went back inside and left them to it.

   Funny thing is, the ensuing conversation probably confused the officer(s) even more. Grandma reiterated the dubious story of the normality of dressing up in pajamas without footwear, for one. And also (wondering if the officer could get any straight answers from me) called me autistic... which the guy said I most definitely do not seem... so, hmm.

   It's genuinely still a toss-up whether this is going to get anywhere, if it's going to get filed as an official incident or whatever. Shoot, probably. I don't know police procedure. So who knows, maybe the FBI will use some of their resources to look into me, instead of trying to track down Jack the Ripper or whatever.

   Still hilarious, though.

Grape Juice

   At the end of Wes Anderson's Fantastic Mr Fox, they break into the supermarket and all drink juice boxes. Apple, of course, for everyone except Ash, who's chosen grape. Which juice, characteristically, stains everything it touches: Ash has got a ring of dark purple 'round his lips. Which kills me, because that's how that works.

   I was watching the film one day at that scene when Mom came in: "why is that fox wearing lipstick?" It's grape juice, but this is the first time I've ever really noticed. In the film, there's a recurrent theme of Ash being [appropriate hand gestures here] different, and from that there's... I'm going to call it speculation, deeper into his character. I'd never held it, but I always found it quite lovely and poignant, the notion that Ash is actually gay and doesn't realize it yet though his father does. Just watch it again with that theory in mind. It really adds something stirring to the relationship, doesn't it? But up until that point I hadn't given the idea much thought or credence (his "dress[ing] like a girl" is his superhero costume, for one.) But since then...

   Grape juice has stood as a symbol of homosexuality, to me. Subconsciously. I didn't even realize it until today, when context brought it to my attention.

   In all innocence, they served grape juice at Grandmother's house...

Butterflies

   You know that joke where the man dreams he is eating a giant marshmallow, and when he wakes up, his pillow is gone? That actually happened to me once. It's apparently a joke about eating your pillow in your sleep or whatever, but I never realized that; I just figured it must have been a common (enough) experience that I wasn't the only one.

   The pillow turned out to have fallen off of the bed and rolled underneath it, in case you were wondering. But none of that is what this post is about.

   I had a dream once, when I was very young. A different dream. I know I wrote part of it down, in stapled-together homebound book format, or at least illustrated it. The original book has probably been lost to the garage, like so many others from that era (the likewise unfinished books of the Aladdin and Dragon Tales dreams spring to mind,) but it wasn't much of a plot, so I can remember it well. Even then, it wasn't so much a plot as an idea... the dream was about a butterfly. The dream was about a butterfly. And I was the butterfly.

   And though I never would have forgotten, I never would have thought, I'm not the only one to have had this dream. The butterfly fell asleep as I woke up. As we woke up. We dreamt that we were butterflies. The butterflies dreamt they were us. And to this day I still can't figure out...

   whether I was Zhuangzi dreaming... or Zhuangzi was me.

Raymond Babbitt in Vegas

   I'm not sure how, popular or whatever, it is to like Rain Man, anymore, especially for an Aspie or for anyone, (I'm probably going to get torn to shreds for this,) but, Rain Man! I think that it's a terrific film. Smart, iconic, unevil, and with heaps of Tom Cruise. My legs are jelly.

   The climax and most iconic scene is Vegas- Charlie gets Raymond to count cards, everyone has a gay old time and makes a lot of money over the course of the day to the point where Charlie's debts are made up for, and the question inheritance money practically gets mooted, with the only cost being never being allowed to set foot inside a casino ever again. Also that wad of cash lost when Raymond pulls a number out of his butt at the roulette wheel, but, no matter.

   So. Happy ending, yeah? But the movie keeps going... the story's not yet over. Hmm. Let's examine that.

   See, in this scene Charlie has made concession to Raymond's talents, true, but he was still using Raymond the exact same way he uses everyone else (whether the "yes" had been actually in response to a question posed a half-hour ago or not, it was still an accurate response to the question posed to Raymond then and there.) The Vegas scene gets Charlie out of his monetary problems, (which I guess is kind of important since it was all he could think about before,) but I don't think people realize the implications there; he's still using Raymond. You know, the reason he whisked Raymond away from the mental institution in the first place? He's still doing that. That's bad.

   Charlie is the true broken one: Raymond, though not without his problems in relation to change, is more than happy to deal with Charlie on Charlie's terms, but you don't see much of that going the other way. To put in simplistically, though not inaccurately, Raymond is just a problem that needs to be dealt with, because that's the way Charlie sees the world at first. (Prized. goshdarn. rosebush.)

   It isn't until the fire alarm and the scene at the pancake house that there's a full reconciliation between the two brothers, and Charlie is totally transformed. Charlie is able to approach Raymond on Raymond's own terms, for the first time that's real (i.e., syrup.) Charlie making concessions to and taking advantage of Raymond's savant skills in Vegas is a step that highlights both Charlie's and Raymond's natures, bringing the two (finally) together in a way that Charlie can swallow, and in the waffle house Charlie is ready to approach Raymond as a whole person, not just a savant, but an autistic savant. A bundle of complexities. Actually a pretty nice guy once you get to know him.

   It's weird, how many people overlook that.

   Or at least, I don't know, I think people overlook that, but-- the implications of the Vegas scene sure as heck never get brought up in any of the parodies, when it would seem that that's the most riff-able aspect of it, so...

   I was always disappointed that I wasn't named Timothy, but at least my middle name is Charles. I think that's pretty cool.

Thespis Strip Dated Sunday, March 8, 2015

 

Click to embiggen.

TRANSCRIPT:

Collin: Comics are tough.

Well, they're kind of easy, but they're tough.

See, with a sitcom or something, you're allowed to time the humor out in real time, using pauses and beats to achieve maximum comedic effectiveness, instead of the tools you have to work with in comics, using spaces between panels and vision-directing action lines in the hopes that the reader of the comic will read it in any semblance of the comedic timing you have in your head.

On the other hand, with a comic, you only need one joke per strip, and even then only at the very end. Any sitcom set up like this wouldn't last very long.

Not as a sitcom, at least.

Maybe as a cooking show, if all the humor is food-based.

Another thing about comics is that you don't know if any of the humor is even getting through at all. With a stage comedy

(which I know all about)

(or at least used to until my character derailment)

you can tell when the humor is reaching your audience.

For example, this week's entire strip was one elaborate pun, but I have no idea if it got through to any of you.

Still to come: more about the difference between humor on the page and humor in real life.

The M/W/F Supremacy

   I just realized, even with the Ludlum-style post name, that wouldn't have been much more than typical lame excuses on t' lack of more frequent posts recently... Which had been... kind of the point, actually... If it's such a big problem for me to get posts up daily, I fully realize I can switch over to a less frequent schedule, maybe even then getting the chance to juggle between this blog and the woefully underposted-at Things That Don't Even Come Back Around, alternating days with TTDECBA on Tuesday-Thursday-Saturdays? (Underposted-at, totally real vocabulary not made up in any way...) Have to keep up daily for now, though, for reasons I've explained, which does mean insane backlog rush, but maybe one the Hundred Things are posted I can change... Even I'm getting tired of self-absorbed (?) excuse posts, so I'd better make that soon.

   Daylight Savings, I'd been going to talk about Daylight Savings... and... forget it.

   The world is awesome, alright? I think it's great to live in a world where exciting news is happening every day. You can subscribe to an e-service that tells you the latest of what's going on in Orson Scott Card's mind at any given moment, now, you know that? They've cast the I am Not a Serial Killer movie that's a thing that's happening, and John Wayne Cleaver is being played by Max "'Max' in Where the Wild Things Are" Records and Old Man Crowley by Christopher "Christopher Lloyd" Lloyd. You can keep tabs on further announcements on Dan Wells's website, though for Pete's sake don't look too far into that if you don't want major spoilers from the book; my point is, yes, the world is big and awesome, and I can't keep away, and it's happening every day and I've got enough material every day to post probably-- but you notice that I'm telling you to keep tabs on it for yourself... Teach a man to fish, enrich his life, in one sense (isn't that what we're here for? shouldn't that be our primary motivation?); mostly, of course, it's because I've had bad experiences with trying to keep tabs on current events (mostly with that SWAT KATS revival thing a couple years back-- it's like trying to hold a snake that's thrashing in your hand; things keep happening...)

   So.

20 Years

   The earliest memory of mine which I can place a date on is November 20, 1994-- the day of my third birthday. I remember being very confused-- obviously I didn't know what a  birthday really was, which makes sense considering my last one had been a literal half-lifetime ago... I was still excited, though; I remember waking up and tottering around. Perhaps I could sense something in the air; after all, awesome plastic fireman hats don't just fall out of the sky at any minor occasion...

   Didn't give that much thought until yesterday. With that being my third birthday then and my age being 23 now, I've got two decades' worth of memory now swimming around in my nut. Frightening.

   Saw today on Netflix that they've got Jumanji, in a not entirely parenthetical tangent. Fantastic bit of cinema, that-- all so famously made and taking place in 1995 -- "What year is it?!", a half-crazed Alan Parrish (Robin Williams) sputters out. The answer is 1995. "'95...," Parrish marvels...

   Two stinking decades ago.

   That was the greatest movie as a kid-- still is now, of course, but this-- this was the must-see film, yeah? Remember how the AVON lady had a VHS copy, when it was finally released on video... had to beg Mom to purchase it off of her; we'd been so excited...

   But that was all twenty years ago now; it hadn't even occurred to me till I saw that there on Netflix this morning...

Main Characters

   Attended Mass today. My first time. It was for a funeral. It was mesmerizing. I still don't know what a Hail Mary is in football, but, daaang it's sweet in real life.

   After the funeral services, there was lunch. There was a guy there, who'd been at the funeral too... it was crazy; he looked just like Mitch Peleggi. You know who Mitch Peleggi is. Even if you've never heard his name, you'd know his face. You may know him as Walter Skinner from X Files, but you may also recognize him as Lt Caldwell from Stargate Atlantis, or the highway spree-killing UnSub in the classic Criminal Minds episode, "Normal," or... He's in a lot of stuff. He's very famous.

This guy.

   So, yeah, Mitch Pileggi. And maybe this guy was Mitch Pileggi; I don't know. Funny thing, that's probably incredibly illustrative of the way I view reality: I kept on looking over at him, expecting that since he's "played" in real life by a guy I can recognize, he must be an important character, and if anything happened in that scene he'd be a primary actor in it and not just an extra.

   I am being serious.

On Never Having to Do Another Background for Cerebus Ever Again

   I just wrote a 3 page paper and it weren't that hard, chugged out an outline and pasting that into the form it happened to be the perfect number of pages. I'm not intimidated, I'm not intimidated.

   Whew, big week for homework. I've got a 7-page essay due in two days, and... well, not much else. Seriously I think that's it. Any homework at all is an assault against my perfectly ordered kingdom of lollygagging! I guess. It's been coming for a while now, though, and we're so near to the end.

   I feel like... like Gerhard, at end of Cerebus. Dude did the backgrounds to David Sim's artwork, right, only by the end Sim had gone, kind of, famously, well anyway, and Gerhard had been by this point doing the backgrounds forever, and absolutely sick of it, and it had lost its wonder, and, Cerebus was coming to an end, and so Gerhard focused on that-- done by Christmas, done by Christmas. At Christmas time, I'll never have to do another background for Cerebus ever again. And that's what kept him going, and that, more or less, is the story.

   And that's how I feel with this paper. After this paper's done, the, paper, will, be, done. And I've been working on it, and slipping in my blogging, but, that's not what's important, so that's alright, but.

The Fine Line Between the Mainstream

   There's a built-in escape mechanism to the "hipster" subculture which I find absolutely charming. All this freaking indie crap sounds exactly the same, so there's obsolescence built in. It's great: "oh no, the mainstream's found the thing we like, making it cool! Fall back to any one of our seemingly identical indie bands!"

   That being said, I still think it's impossible for this to be the case every occasion-- gonna namedrop like I don't even care-- Fleet Foxes, Neutral Milk Hotel, those guys are all adorable enough not to care if the mainstream breaks in around you; identity is maintained (who names their band after Switzerland that's just weird enough always to be "edgy") you don't even have to bring up whether or not you discovered them when everyone else did. ...I don't think.

   But you don't know the extent of it from the inside. That make sense? No, of course not, that's a terrible way to phrase it. Let me give an example for you instead, then. I worked on Collapse, as an intern, right? Shoestring enough that it's not like anyone got paid, though; the official trailer had to be released through the director's son's YouTube channel instead of his own, seeing as how his own has maybe three or four subscribers and his son's has several thousands (which has more than doubled in the time between then and now.) The director's son, you see, (also playing the main character in the film (again, shoestring) so the move makes some sense) is apparently a fairly prominent YouTube reviewer of K-Pop music videos.

   And here's the, "extent from the inside," thing. Through that Twilght2Mnlght/Lukes of Hazard YouTube channel,  I may have known of Psy's Gagnam Style before it became such a huge hit in the states a few years back. It was interesting, but so were all the other K-Pop music videos and there wasn't much to distinguish any one thing-- references to it started cropping up in more and more places, and, I don't know. I don't know when it became a hit, and that's my entire point. From the inside, you don't know the extent of it. I had known of it, but I wasn't aware it was such a phenomenon because... because I had already known of it. When does the indiestream break off and the mainstream begin? The answers, they don't come easily...