Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Rejection

   The application for BYU Provo (main campus) finally came back. The... application? The acceptance letter. Or rejection letter. Whichever. The announcement. And, which whichever it was, well... They were awfully kind, and I was actually... relieved? 

   Provo actually has a graphic design major-- Rexburg turns out has the arts major with graphic design focus, either as a BA or a BFA. If I wanted (and I'm considering it?) I could change my focus even within my proclaimed major, take whatever class I want, but... my point here-- the focus of this post-- why I'm even bringing this up, all has to do with that: Provo, rejection letter, relieved actually, it's like some kind of world of possibilities being in a smaller pond. 

   Malcolm Gladwell writes in David and Goliath how sometimes it's better to be a big fish in a small pond than a small fish in a big one-- how it can be better to go to a less-prestigious university. Would I still make this choice, to attend BYU-I, even if I were accepted to Provo? It'd be nice to be accepted to Harvard and blow them off, but this is BYU, anyway. At least the animation department is prestigious there, but that's not my intended major anyway, and any animation education to potentially suit my needs fits just as well in Idaho.

   Rejection feels nice. I've been rejected formally a few times, not nearly enough. Mostly in writing, those stories shipped off and slapped down. 

   But it feels awesome to be rejected. I just realize this now-- I need to be rejected more often. But to be rejected means to ship around, and to ship around means to have a manuscript, and to have a manuscript means to have a manuscript written. And writing is not my favorite hobby. It is the one I feel most satisfied by. But it is not my favorite.

   How satisfactory would it be to be rejected? That's the process, the whole process, the system, how everything works: write crap, mail it around, get rejected. Repeat. Success is an accidental part of the program. Though we'd be lost without it.

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