Wednesday, May 8, 2019

Halfway Through

I can't really say with much degree of truthood that today's been productive for me at all. In fact I regressed a lot of ways today. 

This week feels so long. It's only Wednesday, which is a lot further into the week than I'd thought we'd get. On Tuesday and even Monday I kept on thinking it must have been the end of the week, when it was only the beginning. I guess we're halfway through something at least. 

Is this what a threshold feels like? Feeling like I don't want the future to come, while at the same time the future's not coming quickly enough? And it's really destroying my present, because the only way I can enjoy it is unhealthily. I seriously ate, almost a whole thing of graham crackers and frosting, today. And barely got on any of the projects I should have been doing today. 

But I guess things are alright. I was somehow the lightest I've been in a couple of months this morning, which means that at least I won't get too fat off of that. And so on.

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